Between the Lines!

Dandelions Suck

2011-06-11T10:59:00.003-06:00

I am not someone that is easily grossed out. Blood doesn't bother me, weird food doesn't bother me and because of my work, horrible smells (rancid milk) doesn't bother me. Why is it that dandelions bother me?

I hate dandelions. I still am not quite sure why. Is it from my time as a child when my mom would pay me a penny for every dandelion that I pulled? I don't think so, as a kid I thought that was fun. As an adult I think that was a violation of child labor laws. I really can't think of anything from my past that would make me hate dandelions.

When I say I hate dandelions, I mean I DESPISE dandelions. Multiple times a year I will talk about the "war against weeds" on my Facebook page. It really is a war. When I mow my lawn each week I keep my weed spade in my pocket and watch closely for any dandelions that I might run over. If I see one, I turn off the mower and pull it from the ground. I spend at least an extra 20 minutes mowing my lawn each week because of these stupid weeds. When the spring officially started I spent 4 hours or so on my hands and knees pulling out the weeds. After I had pulled them out, I shot a spray of Weed-B-Gone into the crevice left from the pulled weed. I was going totally crazy.

Ultimately I see my yard as a direct reflection on myself as a man. I don't hunt and I don't camp and I don't work on my own cars (in fact, I hate all of these things). I enjoy cooking and reading. My obsession over my lawn is an attempt to justify my lack of manly hobbies beyond eating pizza and obsessing over sports. Dandelions symbolize being lazy, being neglectful of your manhood.

Last night I was spreading some grass seed on a newly salvaged area of my lawn. I spread the new seed very carefully and used two small pieces of ply-wood to gently press the seed into the dirt so the wind wouldn't blow it away. While I did this monotonous task I didn't think about the neighborhood cats that walk through my yard and might misplace seed. I didn't think about the birds that might discover the seed and eat it all before it had time to grow. The only thought I had was "Those stupid dandelions had better stay our of my new grass".

More Than Just a Raghead

2011-03-20T12:37:00.003-06:00

In church a number of weeks ago, I overheard a conservation. I realize that I am admitting to eavesdropping but in this case, I don't really care. The gentlemen speaking were discussing modern world events, particularly the events in the middle east. At one point as they talked, a derogatory comment was made toward these middle-eastern people as being "rag-heads", it took all of my strength not to say something I would regret and I calmly left the room. I have been taking a class this semester on Middle Eastern affairs, particularly centered on the country of Pakistan. While the issues that surround Pakistan are not the same as those surrounding Iraq, Iran, or Afghanistan, the people are very similar and their lives all connect to each other. I hope to dis-spell some of the stereotypes of these humble, peace-seeking people.

First of all, lets reference the term "rag-head". What an idiotic term. First off, Muslim men are NOT required to wear a turban. They wear turbans to protect them from the sun and to delay dehydration in hot climates. The other reason why I hate this term is because it gives an idea that the "middle-east" is the only place where Muslims live. While it is true that Irag, Iran, Afghanistan and Pakistan are all about 97% Muslim, they are not the largest concentration of Muslims on the planet. Eastern Asia has the largest population. The country of Indonesia has 330 MILLION Muslims in it. That is more Muslims in 1 country than people in the United States. Why are we scared of Middle Eastern Muslims when less than half of the total world population of Muslims lives in the Middle East.

The next thing we need to do is to define some terms. Fox News and CNN are idiots and they never share anything in context. Knowing what these terms really mean is more important than almost anything else.

Sunni- The more rich and noble sect of Islam. They believe that their leaders (Imam's) are only human leaders which are to represent the will of the people.

Shiite- The poor sect of Islam. They see the Imam as a divine leader who is infallible.

Both groups agree that the Quran is only to be read and understood in Arabic. Neither group claims any particular devotion to any extremist group. Ultimately, both sects believe that a great Imam will be appointed to rule over all of Islam.

Sharia Law- Sharia law is what most people confuse with "Muslim" beliefs. Sharia law is the law that tells Women to be covered, to cut off limbs, etc. Rest assured, that none of these laws are actually found in the Quran. Sharia law is based off of the "observations" of life of Muhammad. The record of Muhammad's life is vague and large parts are missing. The confusion has resulted in 4 different variations of Sharia Law. Here they are in summary.

Hanbali: This is the most conservative school of Shari'a. It is used in Saudi Arabia and some states in Northern Nigeria.

Hanifi: This is the most liberal school, and is relatively open to modern ideas.

Maliki: This is based on the practices of the people of Medina during Muhammad's lifetime.

Shafi'i: This is a conservative school that emphasizes on the opinions of the companions of the Prophet Muhammad.

Sharia law is what defines Muslims as the "way" they practice. Like Mormon's have the Word of Wisdom prohibiting tobacco and Catholic's don't care. The Hanifi is very progressive. It can allow divorce and women do not need to cover their faces.

Jihad- Jihad literally does mean "holy war", but it does NOT mean "Holy-VIOLENCE". It is the "war" that each person fights against temptation, not against non-believers. The idea is similar to that found in 1 Cor 10:13.

Taliban- The Taliban is in reality a political party. They ruled Afghanistan from 1994 to 2001 when they were overthrown by the War or Terror. The Taliban is a very conservative group in regard to Sharia law. They forbid women to learn anything scholarly after the age of 8. Currently the Taliban has about 50,000 members. While we associate the Taliban with terrorism, it is not the US that they terrorize. They primarily fight against other Muslims because those other groups start to accept Western influence. Other chapters of the Taliban have developed in southern Pakistan and India. These groups deny any collaboration amongst themselves and are actually starting to fight with each other.

Al qaeda- They have been in existence since 1988. They are a terrorist group and function as such. The real surprise about them is the number of members of the Al qaeda there are. Most estimates put it at about 2,000. The US has almost 5,000 registered members of the Ku Klux Klan. Are they not terrorists?

The Problem:

The problem is education. Afghanistan, Pakistan, and Iraq, have no real schools. As a result, young people are naive and under-informed above the complexities of life. This short coming makes them easily manipulated. While countless humanitarian groups are working to educate Middle Eastern people, wealthy Iranian extremists are also trying to convert young minds. Hundreds of millions of dollars are pumped into the mountains of Pakistan to build Madrassahs. Madrassahs are religious schools similar to a Catholic seminary. Parents, particularly poor ones, can drop off their children to these Madrassahs and they know there kids will get food, clothes, water, and an education...for free. Not all Madrassah's are extremist. In fact, most do not support the Taliban or Al-qaeda. Regardless, most are ingraining an Anti-Western sentiment into the students. The most extreme of these Madrassahs was known as the Red Mosque, which was closed down by the Pakistani government.

Iran uses this money to escalate the problems in Afghanistan and Pakistan to draw attention away from Iran. Iran is a wealthy and powerful country which wants nothing more than to stay that way.

Links: The Red Mosque
Part 1
Part 2
part 3
part 4

Conclusion:

There are over 1.6 BILLION Muslims in the world. Less than 100,000 are associated with extremist groups and only 10 people out of 2,000 have ever successfully completed a terrorist attack against the United States. Why are so scared?

Greg Mortensen is the director for Central Asia Institute. This agency is a humanitarian agency that builds schools and trains teachers in Pakistan. He promised to build his first school in Pakistan after being saved by a village of Pakistani people that rescued him after a failed attempt to climb K2. Greg Mortensen has committed his life to helping a people that want peace, not war.

Greg was working in Pakistan when 9/11 occurred. In his book, Three Cups of Tea, he recounts an experience that he had at a dedication for one of the schools that he built. The following quotation starts with a speech given by the Imam of the village.

"We share in the sorrow as people weep and suffer in America today, as we inaugurate this school. Those who have committed this evil act against the innocent, the women and children, to create thousands of widows and orphans do not do so in the name of Islam. By the grace of Allah the Almighty, may justice be served upon them."

"For this tragedy, I humbly ask Mr. George and Dr. Greg Sahib for their forgiveness. All of you, my brethren: Protect and embrace these two American brothers in our midst. Let no harm come to them. Share all you have to make their mission successful."

"These two Christian men have come halfway across the world to show our Muslim children the light of education. I request America to look into our heats and see that the great majority of us are not terrorists, but good and simple people. Our land is stricken with poverty because we are uneducated."

Greg then relates after the ceremony "Many widows lined up to offer Mortensen their condolences. They pressed eggs into his hands, begging him to carry these tokens of grief to the far away sisters they longed to comfort themselves, the widows of New York village".

While on my mission I had the chance to break a fast with a Muslim family during Ramadan. It was one of the most special moments of my life. The spirit was present, confirming to me the greatness of this noble culture and religion. The prophet Joseph Smith said the following:

“A religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things never has power sufficient to produce the faith necessary unto life and salvation.”

I assure you that the true and honest and pure tenants of Islam fulfill this qualification. Muslim people are vilified in our country and persecuted. They have sacrificed more than I to keep their faith strong. May both God and Allah bless them with strength and us with the ability to understand something so different from the norm.

This class is one that I don't mind paying an excessive fee to take because it hasn't just changed my knowledge, but it has changed me...forever.

Grandma at the Temple

2010-10-30T10:42:00.003-06:00

For most people that regularly attend the temple and come from a family that is active in the church on both sides, it might not seem odd for you to see your Grandma at the temple. The Grandmother that I saw is dead.

Being the week of Halloween you might think that I am going to try and tell a weird and out of place spirit world story about my deceased grandma. No I won't go there, I hate Halloween. Instead I will explain that I saw an older woman in our temple session that looked and talked like my Grandma Visser.

If "Dutch Grandma" were a word in the dictionary, it's description would be a picture of a my Grandma Visser. Grandma has a thick Dutch accent and when she was emotional her speech would slur into full Dutch. Grandma did things at restaurants and stores that made no sense to anyone else but it wasn't worth arguing with her about it because she wouldn't change her mind. Grandma was a perpetual cheater at board games and loved chocolate.

While at the temple we saw a women with a very Dutch nose and a thick Dutch accent. Kelly later told me something that this women said as she was sitting down. Being hard of hearing, she spoke loudly. As she sat down, she turned to the woman besides her and asked "Is it your Birthday"? The women responded with, "No, why do you ask?". Pseudo-Grandma then said "You look happy. I am happy because today is my birthday and I was curious if you were happy because it is your birthday too?"

Later while in the cafeteria we ended up sitting at the table where she was. On her plate was her chicken, mashed potatoes, and a piece of chocolate pie. She declined to get green beans. I thought about going to talk to her but I reconsidered after considering how the conversation would have ended with me explaining that my Grandma was dead.

My Sports Blog

2010-10-01T19:28:00.003-06:00

I think that Kelly has had enough of listening to me ramble on about sports-as I am sure that many of you that read this blog are as well. I have solved this issue with creating a sports blog. Check it out.

7thsenseofsports.blogspot.com

I Can't Remember the Last Time...or can I?

2010-10-01T17:14:00.002-06:00

Weston spent Sunday and Sunday night in the Hospital with some breathing issues as a result of a virus. He spent 23 hours for observation I am normally a mellow guy, not too easily excitable or reactionary to things, but this is my first real time facing something of this magnitude in relation to my son.

Weston was checked into the hospital around 4 AM, he was admitted around 6 AM to pediatrics and from that point on the misery ensued. He was exhausted, but couldn't sleep because of the breathing treatments he was receiving. Albuteral is an inhalant steroid and for about 2 hours after each treatment he is wound up. The problem is that we were forced to stay in our room and play with toys that were not his own. He slept most of the day on Sunday in my arms. When Weston is sick he normally likes mom, but in this case the constant flurry of attention from people wearing bright greens, purples, and even one pair of tie-dye scrubs had him scared. When he is scared he wants me to hold him. Weston finally fell asleep in my arms and Kelly fell asleep on a chair. I on the other hand was not that tired and turned a football game on the TV.

Focusing on the game was difficult. I found my mind wandering into a day dream like state. I asked myself the following question:

When was the last time you cried?

I then remembered, it was the early AM hours of March 15th 2009, the birth of my son. I had started to build up in the car on one of our three trips back to our house from the hospital. I had Staci and my dad take Kelly in the house, I pulled out my cell phone, called the hospital and unloaded a barrage of frustrations on an unsuspecting nurse. After the call, the tears flowed for 2 minutes or so. Then I realized the gravity of the circumstances and went back in the house.

I awoke from my day dream from an intense need to pee and realized that I was crying. There was no particular reason for the tears. Weston was improving and was going to be just fine. It was purely the stress, the lack of sleep and the terror of a kid in the hospital. Later in the day my Mom and Dad came to check in on us.

My Dad is someone that is always uncomfortable in hospitals (My dad looks uncomfortable all the time, but hospitals make it noticeably worse). I have often wondered if it had something to do with his Fathers very young death in life from a battle with cancer or if it was some other story that I have never heard. It was when He came to visit Weston that I figured it out. My dad is a post Cindy Lou Whoo, Grinch that stole Christmas. My Dad has a big, goof-ball, heart that is 3 sizes too big. He genuinely feels compassion for people, even perfect strangers at the hospital.

My dads Job, and even his family are perfect for his big heart. He doesn't need to have any compassion for a boiler, or cooling tower. His kids are independent, focused and very sarcastic people that push his temper much more than his heart.

I am reminded of a Yellowcard song that says "This gift is my curse for now". My dad might be a little too uncomfortable in a hospital to hang around for very long (which is great for a hamburger run to avoid cafeteria food), but outside of a hospital his gift of a big-heart is no curse at all. He shows patience and kindness to my Mom at all times. He puts up with odd neighbors and deals patiently with very needy home-teaching families. In fact, I hope my heart grows three sizes bigger even if it means that I have to inherit the goof-ball traits that come with it. Thanks dad.

Mr. Brightside

2010-08-15T14:00:00.002-06:00

I am starting to fail in my quest to blog on a more regular basis, so I will attempt to counteract this with quality over quantity.

A little less than a week ago, a tragic accident occurred in East Idaho. Four men drowned while boating in the American Falls reservoir. In a state full of lakes created by dams, most avid boaters understand the risks of odd and strong undertows in these man made lakes. We are not fully aware of the circumstances surrounding the accident, but this much we do know.

On board the boat were the four men and their five children. The men were not wearing life jackets. One of the men jokingly pushed another overboard. When he started to struggle, two of the other men jumped in to help. After a brief time, none of them resurfaced. The last man on the boat, then grabbed a life jacket, holding it only in his hands. He was the last victim. The oldest child of 9 called 911. The bodies of the 4 men were recovered a couple of days later.

There are many unanswered questions. We know that alcohol was on board, but was it a factor? Were the kids wearing life jackets? The more you think of these questions, the more tragic the story becomes. I am in no way trying to brighten the moods of these families and especially the children involved. My heart goes out to them and aches at the thought of being raised without a father.

What I hope to paint in this blog is an idea that in the infinite wisdom of our Father in Heaven, this accident actually plays to the benefit of those involved. We all know that our life is temporary. God has a plan for us. How are we to know that these four men were not going to called to return to God at that time regardless of the circumstances? What if this moment was simply their time to go? Can you think of another way that you would like to remember you father besides as a noble hero? I realize that these families lives would be better with these men in them, but if they had to be gone, why not have them pass into the great beyond as selfless and strong men, diving into darkness to rescue another individual?

Another point worth mentioning is that our world is full of flawed people with corrupt personalities. 50% of couples get divorced, 25% of all Americans will suffer from an addiction. Did the Lord prevent the abuse of a spouse, or child from this accident? Will these children grow up stronger, focused, wise and committed to family life as a result of this accident? Will they save another persons life when they reach adulthood simply because they are obsessive about wearing life jackets? We must never forget that nature of God's wisdom is infinite while ours is limited to our own worldly understanding and our small comprehension of the nature of God.

I express my deepest sympathies to these families and pray for the ease of acceptance in the passing of their fathers. I hope they will grow up as Mr.Brightside, seeing the fortunate and small blessings in the most tragic of circumstances. I hope these children knew how much their fathers loved them. I hope that this one act is not the only heroic thing that these children will remember about their fathers.

Food for Thought

2010-05-23T18:19:00.002-06:00

Last summer I participated in the "Idaho Falls-cook off" as a judge. I sat in a room with a bunch of local celebrities and ate different varieties of tail-gate foods. We had wings, dips, and even a salad. Sadly, the salad was the best part. The food I was able to taste was "average" at best. I don't know if I was just being too hard on it, but the highest score that I gave on any dish was a 6. This was to the eventual winner, the salad......which is not "tailgate" food. It was during this experience that I realized that I could out-cook all of these goons. None of my recipes involve mixing Tabasco sauce with store bought BBQ sauce to make my wings. Shortly after this, I decided that this year I would enter the contest rather than judge. The contest was last weekend.

They were much more organized than last year and I entered the "burger" division. 10 entrants total were making burgers that day, some were older moms, others were older dads, and the vast majority were young college kids. 3 of these college student were actually culinary art majors. I was actually the first to present my burger. After I was done presenting, I had 3 hours before they were going to announce the winners. So I packed up my station and grill and was going to go home and come back. As I was about to leave I realized that they had not returned my plates (I used our real plates). I was not about to head home without them. So I went to the room where they were going to be dropped off for pickup (they didn't want us in the judges room). Other burger contestants that had presented after me had already picked up their plates, but mine still had not arrived. I ended up having to wait until 4 to pick up all of my plates. After the judging was over I went into the judges room and picked up my plates asking "why did you hold onto my plates when I was the first to present?" They responded by explaining that they wanted to take my burger home with them. I was pretty excited that they wanted to take my burger home with them out of the 10 that they tried.

As you can obviously see where I am heading with this........I won. I didn't win anything special, just $75 which only covered the cost of the beef I had ordered from San Francisco. Overall it was great to win. I love to cook and I feel good to know that judges got something great to eat that day. The 2nd and 3rd place winners were two of the culinary students. My winning burger was the "Wagyu Steak Burger". It was on a ciabatta burn, with a pineapple chipotle sauce, sauteed onion and mushrooms in a Asian cream sauce, a wagyu patty topped with 5 cheeses and a avocado mayo to finish it off. Wagyu is the american version of Kobe beef from Japan. It has a robust flavor and is naturally tender. I am already planning on next year............lobster?........or........chicken sausage? You will just have to see.

Classless Jazz "Die Hards"

2010-05-12T09:26:00.006-06:00

Living in Idaho I am surrounded by Jazz "die hards" these are people that are more than just fans, but rather eat, sleep, and breath Jazz basketball. The Jazz are a solid team, well coached, play hard and make something almost always out of nothing. I wish I could praise the attitude of Jazz "die hards" in this manner. They are childish, ignorant and rude. You might ask how I know this, here is my example.

In the Jazz's latest playoff series loss to the Lakers (3 in a row), the fans booed former Jazz guard, Derek Fisher. Derek played with the Jazz in the 2006-2007 season as a mentor for their young point guard, Deron Williams. During this season with the Jazz, Fisher's daughter was diagnosed with a rare eye cancer. Very few medical facilities are capable of treating this cancer and Derek and his family were stuck traveling from UT to NY for treatment. After making numerous flights back and forth to be with his family and to play for the Jazz in the playoffs, after the season was over Derek requested a trade to live in a city with better medical care. The late and noble Larry Miller did one better. He released Fisher and told him to seek the best care for his daughter. In the next couple of weeks, Fisher signed with his old team the Lakers and he has been labeled a traitor ever since. Lets break down the facts.

1. Cancer scares the crap out people. They become emotional wrecks, especially parents of kids with cancer. I am sure that there were facilities in Utah that could easily have treated her cancer. If I was Fisher, I would want to live in a community that I knew well and that would give me the best possible support group. Fisher had been in Utah for less than a year after spending the previous 11 in LA. If a competent doctor lived in LA as well as Utah, where would you move?

2. Which team was better?-UT finished the year 51-31 and lost to the Spurs in the Western Conference Finals. The Lakers finished 42-40 and were destroyed by the Suns in the first round.
The Jazz had basically the same roster as they have now, with the addition of Kyle Korver. The core is the same. The Lakers had Kobe......the second leading scorer on that team was Smush Parker. They also had an injured Bynum and one of the worst draft picks of all time........Kwame Brown. Utah was the better team.

3. Money- Fishers contract with the Jazz was worth 22 million, the contract he signed with the Lakers was 14 million. He took an 8 million dollar pay cut to move from a city with better doctors and to play on a worse team? Sound stupid to anyone else?

4.Drama- Also to be remembered was that this is the summer that Kobe demanded to be traded. If you look at the timeline, he had already made this demand when Fisher signed his Lakers deal and this was before they got Pau Gasol from the Grizzlies. Not only were the Lakers a worse team when he signed, but they had almost no hope of getting better.

5. Why does Utah care? The Jazz are a team that historically do not pay the luxury tax (a fee you must pay the NBA if your salary exceeds the salary cap enforced by the NBA). The same summer that Fisher left for LA, D-Will was a free agent. The Jazz were already tied down heavily from large contracts to Carlos Boozer and Kirilenko and would not have been able to offer a competitive offer to D-Will without the added space of having lost the pricey Fisher contract. Jazz fans need to ask themselves, would they rather have Fisher or D-Will long term? Without Fisher leaving, they would have lost D-Will to the Mavericks or the Miami Heat who had just failed the Gary Payton experiment.

My message to Jazz "Die Hards"- don't be jerks! What happened is best for everyone. Don't take your teams constant underachievement out on someone that was trying to be a good father and has never said one negative thing about his time in Utah.

OYM

2010-05-05T09:00:00.002-06:00

Most people around Idaho Falls have never played or seen someone play organized lacrosse. Most people in these parts do not know the rules or care. Lacrosse is seen as a game for snobs, or mediocre athletes. Lacrosse is most popular on the coasts, east and west. I had friends on my mission that would have been an above average football lineman or linebacker at my High School that were relegated to play Lacrosse in their own High Schools do to the high amounts of superior athletes that were drawn to mainstream sports with the idea of making it big. Most people that play lacrosse play for fun, for love of the game, and for scholarships. Most lacrosse players understand that the sport is merely a vessel and a way to help them get an education. This was the case for one such athlete, Yeardley Love. Yeardley was a senior at Virginia University and was set to get her college diploma this month, tragically this will not be the case.

Love was a 2nd string defense women for the team. She was quiet and a good student. She did not stand out to the main stream college crowd, but as reporters and police have interviewed friends and family-no one had something bad to say about her. Even at such a young age, she was a good member of humanity.

George Huguely was also a senior at Virginia. He was also set to walk the isle and grab a diploma this month. He was member of the men's lacrosse team. He came off the bench of the number 1 ranked college lacrosse team in the country. He and Love had been a couple.

Early Monday morning, some of Love's friends found her lying face down on her bed in pool of blood. Her door had been kicked in, her computer was missing and tragically a life was lost. Huguely was arrested later that day where he admitted to the altercation in detail, claiming it to be an accident. Regardless of the details surrounding the missing laptop and if Huguelys motives were pre-meditated or not are not that important. Love's life was lost, her parents, friends and classmates grieve the loss and seek closure. Love's life is not the only death.

Huguely has withdrawn from school. He has yet to enter a plea and in such a gruesome case I imagine that a large part of his remaining life will be spent incarcerated. He will fall into the hands of the justice system. At that point he will still have a choice, will he learn from his mistakes, seek help and return a positive contributor to society once again? Or will he end up as Brooks Hatlen from "Shawshank Redemption" and be a victim of the system, lost forever.

As sad as this tragic story is, I am more saddened by the fact that no one saw it coming. How well did Huguely's parents know him? In his 22 years of existence, did no one see one thread of evidence that this person might be capable of the unspeakable? Did a teacher, friend, or coach choose to ignore the signs because it was the easy thing to do? Someday Oprah might do a special and reveal all the signs in this young man's past, but for now I will choose to learn from this experience. I will open my mouth, make a phone call.

I hope for the sake of Huguely's friends and family that this behavior was an anomaly from his normal disposition. My heart goes out to the tortured soul that knew something and said nothing. For if this is the case, than not just 2 lives have been lost, but maybe even 3...4...5 or more. Any action taken to save a life even if made in hast and often in awkward circumstances is worth the social cost. I echo the message of LDS missionaries all over the country...........................OYM. Open Your Mouth.

Mists of Darkness

2010-03-23T17:38:00.002-06:00

DISCLAIMER: I wrote this while waiting for a heavy fog to clear on the route this morning, so pardon any typo's. Also, this post is not meant to instill ANY kind of sympathetic response. I do not mean for this to come across as pouting about "hardships", if this is the least of my problems I should consider myself lucky. So many other people have much more serious problems. So here it is.

I am parked on top of the Ammon hill, stumbling in my typing on this
keyboard clearly designed for smaller fingers. I will put up with this
frustration to share a great experience with you.

I am not one to complain or whine, I like to think I take after my
father who exhibits quiet strength and humility. In this last month I
have struggled. My grades are good and I enjoy learning but the trade
off of listening to Weston pounding on my bedroom door to come play as
I ignore him to study is heartbraking. It is my love for my son that
drives me to go to bed a 6 and get up at 1 AM for work.

My sales on the route have been horrible. Not bad enough for us to
need welfare or anything of that nature, but the plans that we had to
expand our family have been put on hold. Kelly is contributing to our
financial efforts first by starting a babysitting job during the day
and then has picked up a couple of shifts watressing on the weekends.
I have no problem with her working, I just know what she wants and
what the Lord wants her to do. She should be a mother. She is such a
fantastic mother. I find happiness in Kelly's happiness and it hurts
that she has wait due to my lacking sales.

I completely understand that my sales are not a reflection of my service but rather
circumstances out of my control. Regardless of me understanding this,
I am a winner, losing is not in my DNA and I see all of these
circumstances as adversity winning. It does not sit well with me.
In 1 Nephi 8:23 describes the mist of darkness. I always assumed it
was like sitting in a dark room until this morning. Parked on the side
of the road right now I see no more than 2 feet ahead of me. I am
parked in front of a house with a number of spotlights they leave on during the night, which I know are there but cannot see. Delivering milk in these conditions is difficult and often dangerous.

This is the thickest fog I have ever seen . It is with this fog that I
have found the silver lining in my current circumstances. Those that
wander without the rod in the mists of darkness are not all that
different from those holding to the rod. They are looking for
happiness and there journey will be hard just like those holding to
the rod. The difference is not the rod, but rather the reward. The
tree of life is more than just the big things like our second child,
my graduation or a family vacation. Getting home today and having the
chance to hold Weston, kiss my wife, shower, drive to class with a
fantastic professor are part of the tree. Those away from the rod seek
for good things but they are things that have a short shelf life.
Cars, sex, popularity in the eyes of peers are examples. Seeking for
these things is not necessarily a bad thing as long as you work to
share them with those that will benefit from them. Being lost in the
mists of darkness is being lost in your own ego. I now know that I do
not fall in this group. At times I have been in this group and felt
entitled to be due to what I perceived was a great sacrifice. No level
of sacrifice leads to entitlement. The Savior still gave all the glory
to His Father after His death on the cross. No one is entitled to
anything beyond what their effort warrants them. The rewards for my
efforts are coming, it will just happen on a different time table than
my own.

There are only inches between being either a hero or has-been. I
choose hero today and everyday. Not because I need it, but because my
family does from me as much as I need it from them.

Video #2- Weston's first year

2010-02-19T21:30:00.002-07:00

The Most Powerful Four Letter Word

2010-02-09T18:59:00.005-07:00

What is the hardest thing that you have ever had to do? Was it completing the last mile of a marathon? Was it beating cancer? Was it graduating from High School, college or graduate school? Was it restoring a classic car, or building a new addition onto your home?

Or was it saying goodbye to a friend that moved away as a child? Was it burying a child, spouse or parent? Was it losing your job and filing for unemployment? Was it breaking off an engagement, or even more....a marriage?

First of all, Kelly and I are fantastic. She is my headlights and I love her more and more everyday for that elegant quality. The two lists of hardships above are separated by one attribute, love. The hardest physical pain I have ever had to endure was after getting hit by that car on my mission. My job everyday is physically draining, but none of these circumstances even compare to the struggles that occur when love is involved.

When Kelly was giving birth to Weston and after being sent home from the hospital once again, she gave into exhaustion and broke down. She lost her strength temporarily. I simultaneously lost my temper and subsequently belittled an unsuspecting nurse. This is without question one of the most difficult situations I have ever had to endure. My deep love for Kelly and Weston made it so much harder. It still stings, even today to see someone and something that was so far out of my control.

This is what makes love so hard. You cant set deadlines or time-lines for love. Some day's you make progress, others you take steps or even leaps backward. It is nearly impossible to quantify success in love. The world will tell you that it is sex, children, or the number of years you are married. These are all guesses and often time the people that are "in love" don't really know the true status of there love.

As scary as love is, nothing is more satisfying or a higher risk. You open yourself almost completely to another person and you trust them. These people we trust with our hearts have the ability to either build us up or destroy us. Regardless of the destruction, life goes on. It will take time, often life-times, to pick up the pieces and move on but we get up and build up. We get stronger, kinder, more patient and understanding of our own and other peoples emotions. These people that face the destruction of love more completely understand this powerful four letter word, love.

The last question is "Is it worth it"? Yes! It defies all areas of logical thought, but we will continue to love. We will love regardless of the wounds that might never heal. We do it to defy the odds that life is devoid of humanity and compassion. We hope for the love that will create that relationship, the one relationship that makes us a more complete version of ourselves. We love because we have hope for unaltered glee and bliss in the arms of a spouse, parent, child or friend. The minute we give up on love, we give up on those that love us. We cannot afford to pay this price.

Always remember that if love wasn't hard, it would be nothing more than another four letter word.

TMI

2010-01-29T11:37:00.004-07:00

Thats right people.......time for some TMI, too much information.

I realize that there are many problems facing the world, I would like to address one that will affect everyone at some point of there lives. Poop problems.

Kelly grew up in a home of 5 boys, yet has never heard someone talk more about poop than me. I don't tell poop jokes, but am rather curious about poop. I find it amazing that almost everything that I eat (with a few exceptions) turns into poop. Kelly just doesn't get it.

When I think about the food I eat, I think of the poop consequences. Is it too much dairy? Is it too spicy? Is it too much fiber? Am I the only one that thinks this way? I am not saying that eating should feel better than pooping but the following rules should always apply.

Eating>Pooping

Eating should almost always feel better than pooping. If it does not, than the trade-offs of what you are eating are clearly not worth it, regardless of the magazine that you read in the bathroom.

Subversively; Pooping>Food you eat

This law only applies when trying new types of foods, or things out of the norm. When you gave goats milk a try and its unique sour and salty, glue aftertaste resided just below your esophagus it should feel better leaving your body than entering. I love spicy foods but eat them sparingly due to the fact that the Lava Taco at Taco Bell is a lose lose pooping situation. They are just not that good in the first place despite the $89 cent price tag and they are even worse coming out. In many cases, if planning ahead you can use over the counter medications to remedy the side effect to pull the marginal cost of eating and the marginal benefit of pooping back to pooping equilibrium. I am not advocating the preemptive pepto frequently, but just in certain situations.

Lastly, you can tell alot about your bodies health by the condition of you poop. When I have eaten a large meal and pooped very little, it is rush hour and I can expect a long wait before my next exit. The rest of my poop condition notes are about consistency and I will skip over them for all of my 5 readers sake.

I started my personal poo mental notes when I was on my mission. In one of my areas a nutritionist at the Mayo Clinic gave me the corner stone of my current poop philosophy.

He said "Two Foot Floater".

We can all dream cant we.

New Years Resolution-Write More Blogs!

2010-01-06T18:41:00.002-07:00

In 2009 I wrote 14 blogs, compared to the 30 or 40 during the previous two years. My goal this year is to write more blogs.

School started for me yesterday. After 6 months off, part of me was thirsting for knowledge. The other part of me wishes that the hardest part of my day was still finding the time to watch "sportsnation". Between my time at school, work and studying I spend very little time with my precious family. This upsets me, in fact part of me thinks that this cannot possibly be fair. I attend a religious university that tells me that my family is the most important thing in my life (which it is). If this is the case, why not lighten the load a little bit? I remembered the answer today.

As the Lord sat crying, bleeding from every pore in the Garden of Gethsemane, did his load get lighter? No, not really. He was given strength from an angel, but ultimately he made the most extreme sacrifice in the history of the world. My load will not get lighter and I accept this. What I do not accept is failure. I grew up in a home with one of my heroes, my father. He is the reason all of us Visser children know how to work hard. He traveled often and for a couple weeks of every month he was on the road. He was and still is a fantastic father. It is the bitter memory of having my father gone for so many days that I do not want to lighten my load. I want to set the example for Weston that my father set for me. I want to feel the satisfaction that comes after success in the face of overwhelming odds.

My motto for 2010 is the following from the rap song "Soldier".

I'm a soldier
These shoulders hold up so much
They won't budge, I'll never fall or fold up.

I'm a soldier
Even if my collar bones crush or crumble
I will never stumble.

The Holiday Season

2009-11-14T08:27:00.002-07:00

Kelly loves Christmas and wants to start celebrating as soon as Halloween is over. I also love Christmas, but it is still far from my favorite holiday (the 4th of July). The reasons I don't like Christmas are as follows.

1. Pressure of getting the "right" gift. I have so often heard that it is "the thought that counts" only to realize that this is in fact a bunch of BS and that the thought dwarfs in comparison to the gift itself. I understand that I, like many, have fallen victim to the commercialism of this day. When you combine this with my strong distaste for shopping in general I have my first case against the Holiday Season.

2. Christmas used to be a relaxing time of eating sweet treats, waiting for school to get out, and playing in the snow. Since becoming an adult, Christmas is hectic. You are trying to juggle family time and doing the appropriate activities for the season. This is all multiplied in my own life due to my work. People drink more milk and order more product in the winter months, almost 20% more. This is my money season and with the economy still on the rebound and with inevitable medical and tuition payments to be made I recognize that the additional earning potential of this season might be necessary during next summer. It is hard to have Christmas Cheer when this time of year is serious business for me.

3. Christmas in Idaho will never be Christmas on my mission. The two best Christmas' I have ever had were the two on my mission. They were the best because they were absent from the commercialism of the season and the true purpose of the Saviors birth was felt in its entirety as a missionary. Now that I am home for over 3 years from my mission I feel guilty around Christmas for my weak missionary efforts and how little I do to help those in need around me. Christmas on my mission was a time of sacrifice and personal growth, now it has become a time consumed by money (in addition to the unsatisfying growth around my waste that happens each year). It also makes me miss the people from my mission that have had an everlasting effect on my life. The Bradshaw, Parr, Stewart, Wickner, Thomas, and Downs families (just me name a few).

I recognize that all of my issues with Christmas are my own mental issues and how I perceive Christmas. I also recognize that they are solvable problems. Maybe this blog is the first step in me solving some of these issues. I have innumerable blessings to count from my religious beliefs and there affiliation with this season and I hope to make progress in moving Christmas up the list of my favorite Holiday's. For now I will do what I do best, work hard, stay busy, and eat bacon.

Defined

2009-09-29T19:59:00.003-06:00

Definitions are a figment of our imagination, our minds can dilute any half truth or bull faced lie into a rock solid truth.

More than once in my life I have written a paper for school or a talk for church and have asked myself the question "what defines me as a person"? Pardon me while I overturn the table of logical thinking.

I refuse to accept that I am defined by my job, my education, my past mistakes, my past successes and my family.

Rather I DEFINE what it means to be a milkman, I DEFINE what it means to attend BYUI, I DEFINE what it means to be a father and husband. I DEFINE what it means to be LDS. I resolve to no longer allow the circumstances that come up in my life to dictate the person that I am. I chose to write my own dictionary, to escape the maze of mediocrity. The only question left to ask is .......................What word do I add to my vocabulary next?

Failure- Extinct as of September 29, 2009

100 BLOGS!

2009-08-20T14:24:00.005-06:00

This is my one hundredth blog! Here are the pictures that I promised would come!

This is our house. After looking at over 40 homes, our awesome and very patient Realtor found this one for us. We financed using Idaho Housing and Finance and lets just say that like all government agencies, it came down to the wire! Lucky our mortgage officer was also amazing and we closed on the last day possible without an extension! We were one of the first to use the 8,000 dollar home buyer tax credit as collateral to finance a down payment, amazingly it all worked out and we even amended our taxes from this spring to get the credit early. We used it to pay off all of our debt (except the mortgage) and it feels great! (it also bought Kelly new glasses and me an XBOX! with the rest sitting in savings). I wish I had a before and after picture of the backyard! I have become a regular in the home and garden center at the Home Depot by our house. You can ask Kelly, I have worked very hard on our lawn and have made unbelievable progress in one summer. We had 7 stumps removed and I finally got around to planting grass 2 weeks ago in those spots that were torn up by the auger. I am amazed how green it looks on camera. I will post another picture in the future of the finished backyard.

This is the newest addition to our family, his name is Turdherder! He is a 1987 Honda with a leaky gasket seal, a gas tank that you cannot fill all the way or it sloshes out the loose cap when you turn too sharp. The throttle cable sticks making it so that I have cruise control all of the time. It was 600 bucks and is a great to and from work car for me. It has a future in a demolition derby, but only if Staci will be my co-pilot.Oh yeah! If you missed or forgot, we had a baby! He is a funny little guy, who is growing like crazy! He is very long and very skinny! We love him very much and will be so grateful when he finally finishes this round of teething. I wish we had a better camera, he has thin blonde hair that seems to float off of his head, he is a miniature version of Doctor Emmit Brown on Back To The Future.

May your spirit reside with .......

2009-07-07T17:33:00.003-06:00

Kelly has pretty vivid nightmares, not often, but they do happen. Last night was one of those nights. When one of these nightmares occurs we generally say a prayer together to calm her down and then we can get back to sleep.

I am not a heavy sleeper and I struggle to fall asleep when it is light outside, so I take Advil PM to help me get to sleep. The only side effect that I have is that I have more vivid dreams, they are not scary but instead are weird.

So last night when Kelly had her nightmare, I offered to pray. Unbeknown est to me I fell asleep and back into my dream as I was praying. After a brief pause I said the following. "My your spirit reside with.... all those that are associated with the circus.....darn squirrels".

In my dream the elephant show at the circus was in the ring and they had gotten scared by the squirrels that had gotten loose and were running a muck at the circus.

A Small Piece of America.....

2009-06-28T20:24:00.002-06:00

As we approach the Fourth of July I have been humbled by the recent string of celebrity deaths. I realize that many people die every day in odd situations and circumstances and that just because someone is a celebrity should not give them priority over anyone else that has passed away in the last seven days.

A part of me is sad because part of American culture is gone. It might be said that the people that have passed away this week were not perfect people, but no one is. This all hit me today as I heard about the passing of Billy Mays. My wife and I have been loving the Discovery channel show about him and Anthony Sullivan. The show was not only entertaining, but eye opening. Billy was a man of the people, but was a family man first. He was not perfect, but was trying to be better. You could see this effort to be better on the show.

Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcet, Billy Mays and Ed Mcmahon were all people that helped to define what is best American culture and the way of live. Some of us make music, some of us model clothes and are advocates for cancer survivors. Billy helped normal everyday people achieve their dreams, who hasn't wanted some help to achieve their dreams? What Billy did may not equal to the same fame and fortune as MJ or Farrah, but for those of us that know even a little bit about Billy, know that your bowl of cereal at 3:00 AM in front of the TV will not be the same without Billy Mays. My thoughts and prayers go out to all of friends and especially his family.

I hope and pray that someday......someone (even myself) will build upon that small piece of the foundation that it means to be American that Billy Mays started.

Busiest Semester Ever!

2009-06-24T21:01:00.002-06:00

Pictures will come soon, but Kelly and I finally took the leap into owning a home. It has been 3 weeks and we are slowly starting to love our little place. I am constantly fighting the battle against crab-grass, and am slowly winning.

Between, School (3 weeks left), work, and having a funny little 3 month old at home I have no more time to write. My next post will have lots of pictures.

Mission Stuff

2009-05-23T12:53:00.003-06:00

On August I will have been home from my mission 3 years. It is crazy how time has passed from such a great time in my life. I was just minutes ago looking through my mission stuff and found my "letter's binder". It includes all of the letters that I got on my mission, even if they were good or bad.

I want to start by thanking my sister, Staci. She knows knew me better than anyone else then. She never questioned my choices or pushed her ideas onto me. She was the perfect example of faith, in a time in her life where she was going through her own hardships. She needs to know that I will be always be grateful for her always positive letters.

This might sound like I am dissing anyone else that wrote me, this is not true. I always appreciated the mail that I got and they were always full of support. Some were very opinionated, but we are Visser's and it is in our blood to be so. The part that made me laugh out loud was that there are a number of stories, that led to these opinions being shared and causing tension. It all started with the use of my money. One event forever changed the letters that I got on my mission because this event forced me to use the remainder of my mission money on a necessary tool. I will not divulge the story, and have told it to very few people and told no one while I was on my mission.

I will admit, in High School I spent my money like an idiot! This habit was quickly kicked when I got home from my mission (all except for my first bike which I bought on credit and then quickly sold). My seemingly "unwise" use of money was a frustration for everyone. My parents graciously gave me spending cash each month to make up for this money shortage and I owe them many thanks. This did not stop the letters full or financial advice from coming. When I would get these letters, I would not like them. So when I would write letters on P-day I wanted to write happy letters, so I would start by writing letters to the "girl". After writing her letter first each week I would then write everyone else. It was hard to not let this "girl" influence my letters home to my parents and friends. So this would start a vicious cycle of letters from my family that would be about money to letters about the "girl", repeated twice a month. All of this came from me abstaining from telling one story. Now, I ask myself it it was worth it? Yes it was.

Many people, not only my family were afraid that I was losing focus and had too many distractions. They might have felt that way for awhile but eventually those fears were quieted when I was blessed to participate in 10 baptisms (3 times the mission average per missionary). Had over 300 investigators to church in two years. Taught over 1500 lessons. Read the Book of Mormon 9 times, and Preach My Gospel 22 times. I wrote over 150 pages of trainings and talks that I still use today (these numbers are all accurate, I counted them all). My efforts on my mission led to my subsequent finding a beautiful wife and the best Mother that I know, having a wonderfully happy son, and the being able to provide for them with my single income and to be debt free, attending school and purchasing our first home.

It is true what they say, actions do speak louder than words. I really am grateful for the love and support of my family during my mission. There words of warning, as frustrated as they made me at times, were out love and care. I have great respect for all of them, and I hope to emulate the love we had in our home growing up in my own home.

Ultimate Taste Tester

2009-05-08T14:39:00.002-06:00

For a while I thought that the ultimate taste tester would be my dad, but then I realized that the man has a carbohydrate phobia and that many great foods are made of carbs and not just MEAT, sorry Dad!

The ultimate food tester is a Dog. I know that the first thing you might think is that a Dog eats road kill, drinks water out of the toilet, and licks its own behind. These are all strong arguments. But you should be asking, what will a dog NOT eat? If a dog eats a dead bird, rather than think "gross! roadkill". Think "yum, poultry". When he drinks out the toilet, think "I should drink water from a porcelain cup".

Now lets look at what a Dog won't eat. A dog won't eat a pretzel. Why? Pretzels are gross, that is why! They might lick the salt off, but not the "thing" that is leftover. I once fed a sourdough pretzel to an angry dog on the milk route and it ran away in terror.

Carrots. I once saw a dog not eat a carrot that was covered in peanut butter. He just starred at it saying "Why ruin that perfectly good peanut butter?". I have seen dogs each celery, lettuce, and broccoli without any dressing or topping on them. So clearly it is not just vegetables they don't like. Dogs are also a good way to test the health of our diet. Many dogs do not each chocolate, soda, candy or coffee. This could also be a dieting tool.

I am not saying that there are not exceptions to every rule, including this one, but the next time someone asks you to eat something funny ask yourself if a dog would eat it?

Naps

2009-04-09T20:36:00.002-06:00

I may not be a real member of the Visser family. I hate naps.

Every member of the Visser clan (including my wife) are all terrific nap takers. I on the other hand hate them. I will tell you why.

I loved my mission. I have spent a good amount of time this week on the phone with old mission companions, members, and converts, catching up and inviting them to Weston's baby blessing. Maybe in my digging up memories of my long lost past, I have stirred up old habits.

On your mission, every P-day is like fine chocolate. You cant eat it all at once, it will make you sick. You cant let it get too cold or too hot because it ruins the texture. It needs to be a busy day, but everything that you do needs to be fun. The biggest way to destroy your P-day is to take a nap.

I quote Pres. Evans when he was asked by a missionary is he can take naps on P-Day "You can take a nap when everyone else takes a nap, at 10:30". He was referring to lights out for sleep. Ever since this day, naps have felt like such a waste of time. What could you have done in those 30, 60, 120 minutes? I hate to think about.

This reasoning explains why I am more grumpy when I wake up from a nap rather than before I take one. I do dumb things after a nap. For example, I snapped at Kelly for wearing my pajama pants an hour ago, right after I got up from a 2 hour nap. I then cleaned the kitchen in like 10 minutes to try and make up for my lazy nap.

Dear Weston

2009-04-04T01:14:00.002-06:00

Dear Weston,
I should be spending this time working on homework as I am behind and the semester is about to end. The last three weeks have been so exhausting, but so worth it. You are a special spirit with limitless potential. Your mother and I often wonder how we got so lucky. This short note is the first of my fatherly advice. My first point is going to be the best advice that I can give you. Listen to your mother. She is a noble person full of charity and love. She and I will always be here for you. Despite our mistakes and the ones that you will make, we are a family and are only as strong as our weakest member. I want you to be independent and able to care for yourself and your family, but never be afraid to ask for our help.
As your father I look forward to those days were you learn life's lessons about work, trust, love, and faith. You and I share a common name, just like I share a common name with my father. I would consider it one of the greatest honors of my life to share my father's name, he is a hero in many ways. I only hope that you can feel the same way about me when you have your own children. I leave with you lyrics from a song that in 20 years will do nothing but make me feel old, but describe how I feel perfectly.

When I was,
A young boy,
My father, took me into the city
To see a marching band
He said "son when, you grow up, will you be, the saviour of the broken, the beaten and the damned."
He said "will you defeat them, your demons, and all the non-believers, the plans that they have made, Because one day, I'll leave you, a phantom, to lead you in the summer, to join the black parade."
My Chemical Romance "The Black Parade"

I love you,
Dad

Valentines 2009

2009-02-15T13:56:00.005-07:00

Last year Kelly and I were able to go down to Salt Lake and splurge for a weekend. This year, considering Kelly's current condition (pregnancy), travel was out of the question. So Steve (my next door neighbor) and I cooked a six course meal for our wives. The following are photos of the six courses with a description and that star rating for how well liked it was (by me that is).

Course 1: French Onion Soup; covered with gruyere cheese and a sourdough crouton (4 stars)

Course 2 Pineapple Chile Gazpacho (2 1/2 stars)

Course 3: Walnut/Apple/Celery Salad with honey Dijon Vinaigrette (3 1/2 stars)
Course 4: Pork Ribs with a glazed pomegranate chili reduction (5 stars)
course 5: Pistachio/Cilantro pesto chicken breasts (4 stars)

Course 6: Chocolate Fondue with fruit. (3 stars)
Everytime I get to cook like this I consider switching my chosen career again, (don't worry Kelly, I won't switch again).

How sad!

2009-02-01T01:06:00.002-07:00

This is the latest that I have been up in a long time. I have been watching a movie and working on my lesson for tomorrow. I goggled something on the Book of Mormon and found what I needed, yet at the same time I also found about a million anti websites at the same time. One website was just a website of testimonials of why people have left the church. I read a number of them, probably ten, and was amazed. I only found one that had a doctrinal reason. The rest were all social reasons like being treated poorly for being a democrat or for having sinned and the guilt they felt. As I read these reasons, none of them being valid, I just felt bad for these people. Not because they were bad people but because they were so angry. No human is perfect. Do not realize that these are experiences that everyone has at every church or school. I guess that I am mostly confused. We don't try to be jerks. I just wish that regardless of what people believed that we could live together without fear of things that we don't understand.

Our First Video!

2009-01-30T20:44:00.004-07:00

Well kids, here it goes! My first video, keep and eye out for more to come!

Talking in her sleep.

2009-01-07T15:34:00.002-07:00

I am doing home work right now, Kelly is asleep on the couch and she is talking in her sleep about pets.

"what don't you like about dogs?"-ME

"They stink, and they aren't as soft as kitties."-Kelly

"what don't you like about fish?"-ME

"they are boring, they just don't do anything!"-Kelly

"Are you typing what I say?"-Kelly

"No of course not."-ME

"What about Gerbils?"-ME

"No, they just poop alot and have babies all day everyday, and they get sick and die"-Kelly

"All animals get sick and die"-Me

"Gerbils do it in one day. They get sick and die in the same day"-Kelly

Foot Problems!

2008-12-18T17:25:00.003-07:00

For the second time in a month, I have rolled my right ankle. The bruising on this one is blog worthy. Try to focus on the bruise, not my funny looking feet.I wish I had taken this picture a day earlier. It would be a darker bruise. The dark lines in the bruise were caused from my compression wrap. I think I wrapped it too tight once. My entire foot is swollen too. This last photo is of my toes. On Wednesday morning I woke up and tried to pop my toes. I could not get my toes to pop but it hurt like crap. Then after work, I took off my socks and noticed that my toes were bruised. The bruising on my toes has spread too!
Cool HUH?

Conversations

2008-12-06T11:55:00.003-07:00

I figure that a funny blog is in order to inaugurate our new computer.

This is mostly for Jodi and Scott, they will fully appreciate this more than most people will. This also will make them a little more excited for most of my family to be spending Christmas with them. The following are two very funny conversations.

The first is from thanksgiving. We were playing a rousing round of "the dice game" and the following conversation followed between my older brother John, my Dad, and a short statement by myself.

-John pulling on my dad's unruly arm hair says "I shudder to see your back".

-My dad says something that seems at first to be completely unrelated "My back is like a duck"

-I say "You have feathers back there?"

-My dad says "Noo" (in a way that only my dad can say) "Waterproof hair!"

My mother was not paying attention to this short exchange, but I wish she was, I would love to have seen the look on her face as her husband tried to put a productive twist on his unsightly back hair.

Conversation number two was between Kelly and my subconscious. I had not been sleeping well a week ago. So on Monday when we were grocery shopping, I picked up some over the counter sleeping pills. After spending about an hour with some friends for a short family home evening, I had to go to bed. I took a pill and quickly fell asleep, a very deep sleep. I do not have any memory of this exchange.

-Kelly comes home for our friends about an hour after I had fallen asleep, knowing that I am a light sleeper, as she entered the room she said "I'm home".

-With the lights still off and me in deep sleep I responded "Who?"

-Kelly again...."It's me"

-"Who the hell are you?"

-"It's Kelly"

-"Who the hell are you?"

-"Your wife......are you asleep?"

-"Do I sound asleep? You woke me up!"

This was all it took for my pregnant and emotionally unstable with to feel bad for waking me up. She then went straight down stairs and slept on the couch. I woke up with my alarm very surprised to not find my wife by my side. I thought that she must have fallen asleep with the TV on. I went downstairs, woke up Kelly and sent her on up to sleep in the bed. When I finished breakfast and made my lunch, I went upstairs to kiss Kelly goodbye only to find that she was crying because she thought I was still mad at her. I was so confused..........and this time I really didn't do anything! She quickly fell back asleep once I explained that I was talking in my sleep. Why else would I be ok to just sit in the dark if someone besides my wife was standing in our bedroom? It just doesn't make alot of sense. I have had multiple good laughs from this story and hope that you will have one too. Now if only Kelly can laugh it off, that might take some more time.

Why ....I.....otta!

2008-11-21T16:48:00.002-07:00

I saw someone the other day wearing a KERRY COLLINS Tennessee Titans jersey. I wanted to stop and rip that thing off of him.

Did he suddenly register himself as the third Tennessee titans fan in Idaho Falls? He obviously did not fill out the registration card and return it to either Becky Rhoades or myself!

A true Titan's fan would only be caught wearing the following 3 jersey's (of active players)

1. Keith Bulluck. Mr. Monday Night is the only remaining member of the titans superbowl loss in 2000.

2. Jevon Kearse. Yes I know that Jevon was on the team for that same superbowl game, but he left for more money so he doesn't count. But since his return he has been an awesome team player.

3. Kevin Mawae. The greatest center in the history of the NFL. A leadership giant!

Did this guy follow the titans when they were a first pick contender two years in a row? Did he jump on the fire Jeff Fisher band wagon a couple of years ago? Did he cry when they lost the superbowl?

Don't rain on my parade.......... poser! Just because the Titans are 10-0 doesn't mean that you can root for them! You have to earn it!

I Told You So

2008-10-28T17:09:00.003-06:00

For those of you that have not heard, Kelly and I are having a baby boy. His name will be Weston. I have been insisting for a very long time that I "knew" the baby was a boy. I promise that it is not because I am pining for a boy, but rather I had a very cool experience that I have not really shared with Kelly.

Months ago when Kelly was first pregnant and was cramping a great deal both of us were worried that she would miscarry. She had been on birth-control and her symptoms of having a miscarriage were getting more and more. One night when the cramps were especially painful Kelly asked for a blessing. I won't go into too much detail, but either way we were both assured that the symptoms were just normal for Kelly and that the baby would be fine. The promises in that blessing have been a great comfort for both of us.

There was one thing that I "neglected" to tell Kelly at that time, was that I had one of the strongest promptings that I have ever had telling me that we were having a boy. In fact I could even see in my minds eye our sons face, his expression was of peace and anticipation of gaining a body. He seemed to be longing for his mother's touch and the opportunity to show his father what true happiness was. I understand that Kelly has a connection with our son that I will never be able to experience. This brief experience of mine is a connection with my son that I might never feel again and is dwarfed by my wifes already unfathomable love for our son. Despite all of this, I will never forget the night when I saw my sons face, I thank the Lord for his willingness to part the veil for me. I look forward to the night when I can once again look upon that face.

Enough gooey stuff. My sound knowledge of the sex of our baby has allowed me to have a great deal of fun as my friends and family would guess what it was. If they guessed it was a girl I would say "wrong!". If they said it was a boy they were met with praise for their wisdom. Often it frustrated Kelly and she would ask me if I would love a girl as much as a boy. I always said "of course" but then followed it with something like "I would love a daughter just as much or if not more than the son we are having in march". As the months grow closer I get more and more excited. Thanks to all of our friends and family for the unfaltering support.

Cultured

2008-10-24T21:42:00.002-06:00

Two blogs at once! Outrageous! This one is based off of a short conversation that Kelly and I had tonight.

Kelly and I are both cultured, just in very different ways.

Kelly loves music, and when I say music I mean...just music. The only thing she listens to with lyrics is Josh Groban. She knows a ton of classic composers specific works and can tell you all the ins and outs of how it works. Music is a huge driving force in her life.

Kelly was home schooled and she is very observant to small life situations, she pays close attention to the things I say, to what we do each day, to the kids in the nursery, to the choir, but mostly to her feelings. She is the most kind and caring person I know. I am very lucky.

I am very different. Kelly is completely happy living in a very small world, I on the other hand am not. I am an information addict, I love to learn and can never watch enough documentaries, or "how to" videos. If I have a question about science, or history, or in the scriptures I will look it up and I will enjoy it.

On my web browser I have a number of windows open 24/7, CNN, ESPN, Both Fantasy Teams pages, and my email. Our computer was down for one day this last week and I felt out of touch. I dislike music that has no lyrics. I enjoy lyrics that tell it like it is. Genres of music that paint a seemingly false sense of reality bother me. Books, music, art, and movies are always better when you understand where they come from. Likewise these forms of entertainment are best when they leave you with a deep and seemingly unanswerable question (Kelly hates those). I am a typical guy and have a tendency to ignore my emotions.

Either way you look at it both ways of being "cultured" are both good and bad. Luckily for Kelly and I we complement each other in this area. This is just more proof that opposites attract.

Squeaky Brakes!

2008-10-24T21:26:00.002-06:00

I am convinced the longer that I run my milk route that my truck has a mind of its own. It manifests itself through my insanely squeaky brakes. Its mood is a direct reflection of what is playing on my radio. The following are a list of artists that my truck hates! Our taste is music is very similar

1. Bon Jovi
2. Miley Cyrus
3. Billy Joel (It especially hates "scenes from an Italian Restaurant" which is one of my favs)
4. David Archuleta

When these songs are playing, my brakes squeak so loud that I can hardly hear the music over the darn things. What really scares me is what the truck seems to like in music.

1. Katy Perry
2. Madonna
3. Spice Girls
4. Lionel Ritchie
5.Weird Al

I know it seems like a pretty random list, but I have in fact written down the brief moments in which my breaks are silent and function the way that breaks are designed to work. I have been unable to decide if my truck is living in the wrong decade and if it should belong in the 80's, or my other reasoning is if my truck is struggling with its sexual preference.

You might think that I am crazy, but if you ever want the proof, you are more than welcome to join me on my route and write your own list.

Becoming a MAN!

2008-10-17T16:36:00.002-06:00

I don't mean this to sound like I am turning into a redneck or a neanderthal, but I just want to briefly touch on certain things that I have learned about that make males feel like men.

1. Owning a car. Almost a year ago my dad gave me flipper (1995 Ford Contour POS!!!). I am grateful for his generosity and I have no one to blame for the car being a POS but myself. Either way when we traded it in and got our (new to us car) that is great, it made me feel like more of a man.

2. Having kids! I realize that Kelly and I don't actually have a child yet, but everyday we see the doctor, reality strikes more and more.

3. Pain!!!! Getting up each day and realizing that your knee hurts AGAIN and that it will always hurt. This pain leads to my next point.

4. Life Insurance! Everyday feeling a little more tired and a little more sore makes me realize that I am in fact human and that I will someday die. The fear of leaving your family with nothing makes it so you sign a lot of forms and you have a nice fuzzy money blanket. Always remember coach Berger's saying "JUST IN CASE THE COPS COME".

5. Investing! I just got done signing more forms than when I got life insurance to start some very small and safe retirement funds. I find great comfort in the fact that because I started this when I am 23 rather than the average age of 30, that I will be able to retire at a respectable age and give my sore knees a good rest. No matter how you look at it, knowing that I have 36 more years before the average retirement age is not a comforting thought (I better get crackin' on school, huh?)

Here is the common thread amongst all of this. They all cost MONEY! I know that everyone likes having money and I am not complaining that I can provide for my family, and at the same time prepare for the future, but sometimes I hate thinking about money! That's why I go to church and do my callings and help people move, I like to think that I am investing in Jesus. Hopefully I will get a really good return! (jk, just a funny way to think about it).

poobleberries

2008-10-11T22:08:00.002-06:00

I do in fact appreciate all of the comments and suggestions from my friends and family about a catch phrase. The ideas were great but I eventually realized that I couldn't force it and that it would come on its own. On Thursday it did. I had a pretty bad day by milk man standards. I was over 2 hours late leaving, which customers hate. I tried to speed up the process by the use of a 5 hour energy drink only to find our that it in fact tastes like POOBLEBERRIES! (notice the word poo? This means that the drink tasted horrible!)

You might be asking what a poobleberry is, let me explain. A poobleberry is whatever you want it to be. I imagine that when you get sick, it could be caused by poobleberries, if you hurt yourself it could be caused by a thorny poobleberry plant that tripped you, if someone offends you you can throw poobleberries at them (they stain horribly).

The word fits me perfectly. It isn't overly arrogant (or arrogant at all), it is odd, leaves people confused, yet it clearly cannot be a good thing because its root word is poo and it is very fun to say. It is hard not to laugh or cause someone else to laugh by using the word poobleberry. Try it, come on.............try it. Don't be scared, go give someone a good healthy dose of poobleberries!

Catch Phrase

2008-09-24T16:24:00.002-06:00

Everyone needs a catch phrase. When you work in the media you can have just one that lasts the test of time like Emeril and "BAM" or you can have one that changes with the time. I have decided that I need a catch phrase. I need your help creating one, here is a list of criteria that I would like it to meet.

1. My dad,could beat up your dad! (at Greco-Roman wrestling, that is).

2. I am the best milk man in the state right now! (with there being only 4 in the state, I have pretty good odds).

3. Yes, you might be smarter than me but my brother's little toe is smarter than your entire head.

4. My older sister is a secret spy for the CIA.

5. Be careful what you say to me, my twin sister will use Brent Gordon to sue you! (even if he might fold like a cheap tent).

6. Yes.....I know that my hair is to short for my big ears, but I don't care.

7. Hands down, I will utterly destroy you at fantasy football. Doesn't everyone envy my skill!

This is the catch phrase that I was using today. "Bitz-oww!" As you say this you must move your hands in a different way every time. I don't have time right now, but eventually a video will come of my first attempt at catch phrase use.

I used to enjoy the catch phrase "Eat me" but since then I have gained some weight and I drive around in a big cow. These two factors together might justify cannibalism, and I can guarantee that I am not lean meat. This all bothers me.

Please use your creativity and leave me with a new catch phrase in the form of a comment. After enough phrases have been collected a vote will be conducted for the winning phrase. Thanks!

The Shot Heard around the World!

2008-09-24T13:37:00.002-06:00

I heard some news today that I am sure has changed everyones life forever.

If you haven't heard, I am sorry that you found out from me.

Clay Aiken..........is gay!

Hopefully wall street can handle this news.

someday

2008-09-18T23:01:00.002-06:00

someday i'll be a millionaire
someday i'll be a great break dancer
someday i'll be famous rapper
someday i'll run a marathon
someday i'll dunk a basketball
someday i'll be a stake president
someday i'll cure cancer
someday i'll direct an award winning film
someday i'll write a best seller
someday i'll grace a magazine cover
someday i'll open a world famous restaurant
someday i'll own a custom car
someday i'll visit every continent
someday i'll have the answer to every question
someday i'll buy anything i want
someday i'll own a yacht
someday i'll be a senator
someday i'll be a congressmen
someday i'll be president
someday i'll win a noble prize

someday i'll be a bishop
someday i'll be president of a company
someday i'll have nfl sunday ticket
someday i'll own a luxury suv
someday i'll get one stamp in my passport
someday i'll have have a landscaper
someday i'll have my own booth at the local diner
someday i'll have my own scholarship fund

someday i'll teach a class
someday i'll fix a strangers flat tire
someday i'll fix a widows' leaky pipes
someday i'll give an umbrella to kids walking home in the rain
someday i'll play a few songs on the guitar
someday i'll wash the neighbors car
someday i'll shovel a friends driveway
someday i'll find and match all of my lost socks
someday i'll watch my favorite team in person

someday i'll be a hometeacher
someday i'll get a semester of straight A's
someday i'll make the perfect batch of cookies
someday i'll change my own oil
someday i'll make my family laugh at dinner
someday i'll finally catch a chicken
someday i'll create the perfect flavor of ice cream

someday i'll fall in love
someday i'll get married
someday i'll have my first fight
someday i'll be truly sorry for the first time
someday i'll sleep with the lights on after my wife had a bad dream
someday i'll stare at a + on a pregnancy test
someday i'll see my child for the first time
someday i'll conquer my wife's cravings
someday i'll have my first anniversary (oh wait....i am almost there)
someday i'll feel my child kicking

someday i'll hold my baby in my arms
someday i'll bless my baby with the priesthood
someday i'll be called "daddy"
someday i'll teach him to tie his shoes
someday i'll teach her to run like dad
someday i'll rock them to sleep after a night of the flu

someday i'll drop them off for school
someday i'll help them study for the spelling test
someday i'll go on a daddy daughter date
someday i'll go to scout camp
someday i'll cheer for my son as he falls one yard short of the end zone
someday i'll give her a standing ovation even if she missed a few notes

someday i'll give my son the priesthood
someday i'll witness my daughters patriarchal blessing
someday i'll take them out to ice cream after their first heart break
someday i'll watch them graduate
someday i'll send a son on a mission
someday i'll send a daughter to college
someday i'll be the proud father of a return missionary
someday i'll be the proud father of a college graduate
someday i'll give my daughter away in marriage

someday i'll hold my grandchild in my arms
someday i'll stand in the circle as my grandchild is blessed
someday i'll be called "grandpa"
someday i'll teach him to tie his shoes
someday i'll teach her to run fast life grandpa used to

someday...... i'll know........ if i left me on my own..........how far i would go
someday....... i won't be so self-defeating.........i won't kick me when i'm bleeding

someday..............i'll know..................i'll know................?

Its my party and I will cry if I want to.

2008-09-14T16:32:00.002-06:00

I have decided to not classify myself as a "democrat", but that doesn't seem to matter in a state that is 99% republican. I plan on voting for which ever candidate fits what I believe in most. Either way, no one seems to be at all understanding of this fact. If I am an "other" than I must be the devil it seems. It is frustrating. The more opposition I face the more I feel the way I do. The more people that show no tolerance to my ideas, the more it supports what I believe. Here is a short summary of what matters most to me.

1. Stop the war in Iraq. I understand that principle behind why we fight, but it seems the longer we are their the more bridges we burn with other middle eastern countries. We are now pretty much a one country coalition that is spending 10 billion dollars a month to run a country that doesn't really want us their or seems grateful for our presence. Being in Iraq has done nothing but kill soldiers in vain, kill more Iraqi civilians than the 3000 Americans that were killed in 9/11 and increase oil prices to help fill the pocket books of the Bush family and countless other lobbyist organizations.

2. Increase our education standards and make it cheaper. Obama isn't a perfect candidate, ether in McCain. I will give Obama props for understanding that the true way to steady our economy in the long term is to increase the quality of our young people's education. I look forward to the day that part of 10 billion we waste each month in Iraq goes to helping our schools and to help young married couples actually be able to afford college without a loan.

3. I always support the idea of tolerance. I am a religious person. I have high standards and live them the best that I can. Even with my belief system I have no right to tell ANYONE that what they believe is wrong. If someone is a homosexual and wants to get married, who am I to tell them that they cant? If someone believes that abortion is not a sin (it is a sin in most circumstances, but not murder), who am I to tell them that it is? This world would be a much better place if we were all more tolerant of things that are different.

Fitted Sheets! Grasshoppers!

2008-09-13T16:40:00.003-06:00

I just got done putting a set of clean sheets on our bed. I don't mind making the bed or putting the sheets on but I do hate the fitted sheet. I know that there is supposedly a way to tell what way to put the sheet on, but I think I have a genetic flaw that keeps me from knowing the proper way to put the fitted sheet on.

It is always a guessing game for me. The problem with a fitted sheet is that I always think that I can stretch it to fit regardless if it is the right way or not! After getting two corners on, I stretch it until it looks like it will always fit but it turns out to be six inches or so short. It is annoying!

I also went on a long bike ride today out in the country roads. The farmers have been harvesting and you can certainly tell that fall is coming. The skies are filled with hawks and I even saw a couple of eagles as the feast on the field mice that no longer have shelter. The roads are covered with grain and pollen and tons of grasshoppers. My bike is very fast, and my wheels are very skinny, so I don't get bothered too much by the jumping, exoskeletal, bugs.

The only time that I get disgusted by these grasshoppers, is when I get passed by a semi truck hauling wheat, or corn, or potatoes. These trucks produce a large amount of wind, and a couple of times that I was passed by one of these trucks, it would blow a grasshopper into my spokes. My spokes are designed for aerodynamics and are shaped with a sharp edge. I felt really bad about these bugs getting sliced in half. I don't deliberately like to kill bugs unless Kelly makes me. It made my ride today a race with all of the semi trucks on the roads.

My legs are really sore. I would like to thank all of those grasshoppers that passed away today. The 750 calories that I burned today appreciate your life.

In Your Wildest Dreams!

2008-09-11T16:32:00.002-06:00

I know very few people that would say that they have "cool" parents. I am not in any way complaining about my childhood or my parents and in fact I am quite grateful that my parents had rules, and set high expectations for me. My Dad is a very goofy guy and it is really easy to imagine him doing crazy things, my Mom on the other hand loves a good joke but it is hard to imagine her doing something crazy with us when we were kids. Here are five things that would have made my mom an irresponsible mom but a "cool" mom.

5. The Gallon Challenge! We all know that mothers have strong stomachs from cleaning up after us when we had a stomach virus but to have a mom that is willing to make herself sick for entertainment. That would be a very cool mom.

4. Butt Ball! What mom wouldn't want an excuse to not only hit her own kids but all of the kids in the neighborhood that have been teaching your child annoying habits. Bring it on mom, I will you meet you at the pit!

3. Doom! I spent a good part of my childhood on the computer or the Nintendo. No game was quite as fun as killing the spawn of Satan with a sawed off shot gun. Then going on to the throne of the devil himself and putting a rocket in his face. Wouldn' t that be a cool story to take to show and tell.

2. Painting. Splatter Painting. Splatter Painting on the driveway. Splatter painting on the driveway with full buckets of paint. Splatter painting on the driveway with full buckets of paint them have been thrown off of the roof. Dad would freak out, lol!

1. This needs no explaining. PIN THE TAIL ON JODI :)

Arby's

2008-08-22T14:42:00.002-06:00

My last stop of my delivery week is at a place called the "Elk Creek Apartments". It is a senior retirement home. Each week as I exit the building, I walk past a dry eraser board that has a line of tape dividing it into two sections. The top section is a inspirational quote section and the bottom is a daily reminder section. This week had two quotes that I thought were especially funny.

1. "FIND JOY IN EVERYDAY OCCURRENCES"

2. Did you order your Arby's today?

Part of me looks forward to the day where Arby's will bring me joy, the other part of me thinks that I hope I am dead long before my week revolves around the day that I get to enjoy fast food.

P.S. I will write a real blog about this later, but for those that haven't heard yet. Kelly is expecting and is due in March!

I don't envy those guys.

2008-07-31T16:41:00.003-06:00

For some reason, the radio just wasn't going to cut it today. I was bored. I started to ask myself this question...."what would I do if I were elected president?". After a couple of hours of analyzing, I came to this answer....kill myself. Now lets look at what I see is the biggest issue that both Obama and McCain will face as president. The energy crisis. It all comes down to oil.

Obama supports other forms of energy besides fossil fuels (except nuclear). I imagine that if he could be president for the next 20 years that we would all drive electric cars that took no gas at all.

McCain supports off shore drilling and nuclear energy. He has said that the government should offer a reward for someone that can invent a much more effective battery to use in a hybrid car. If he were president for the next 20 years, we would all drive a toyota prius.

Here is the flaw with both plans. What about the budget shortfall that will occur. Our roads, and highways are maintained by the taxes that we pay when we fill up our cars. It was just reported that between the months of May and June, we have seen a drop in people driving that is 4%. That 4% has created a 235 MILLION dollar budget shortfall to maintaining the roads we drive on.

Obama's plan calls for electric cars, Gas stations would be no more. How do we make up the difference? Raise taxes? McCain's plan makes more sense, except that the tax on gas would be unreal i.e. 15% or 20% to make up for the lack of fuel being consumed. How will this shortfall effect employment, travel, tourism?

I realize that we are spending 10 BILLION dollars a day in Iraq and that could easily fix our roads, but how much of that 10 Billion is paying the 140,000 soldiers that are working their? How much of that money ends up back in our country supporting the "invisible hand"?

Is 10 billion dollars a day enough to pay more money in welfare, more money to fix our roads, more money to hold an increased amount of convicts? (when times get hard, people get desperate, and they brake the law).

On the other hand if we start to drill off-shore and continue to push for the use of fossil fuels and then we drag out the war in Iraq. If we spend the next 8 years in Iraq (McCain for two terms), could we pay for the war, support our roads, and pay to clean up more and more natural disasters that our use of fossil fuels help to cause? Hurricane Katrina was close to 200 BILLION dollars.

It doesn't matter how you weigh the circumstances or the policies in question. Both men up for election and all of those that ran might be some of the bravest people in the world. Either way, I don't envy those guys. I will pray for them both. I am starting to have a feeling that the fate of the free world as we know it, might just rest on the shoulders of one of these guys. They could use all of the help they can get.

My Birthday!

2008-07-23T15:21:00.005-06:00

I turned the big 23 on Sunday. It was a a very good day. I got some very excellent presents. Here is a taste of the humorous things that I received.

You are in fact reading this right. This brand of peanuts is called "TRY MY NUTS". Besides the obvious innuendo, these might just be the best tasting peanuts that I have ever had. Thank you Jodi, these nuts gave me many good laughs while I was on the route.
No, David Hasselhoff did not make a drunken appearance at my birthday party, but my brother, John did give me a very funny birthday. In the words of my Brother. " You have been HOFF'D".

Kelly got me a great gift. It is a BBQ grill. I have been wanting one all summer and she was going to have a great surprise for me with this present, but her mom sort of spoiled it. The funny part about this present is that it took forever to get it together! Not because it is hard to do, but their was a defective part that we had to adjust for. It still works great, and I meant to take a picture of my first grilled meal which was Brats and Shrimp, but I ate them too fast!

Thanks to all of you that wished me a Happy Birthday. I hope you all have a great summer! Blog ya later. I still have to show you pictures of the fallen tree!

Gotta Love the Movies!

2008-07-18T20:17:00.005-06:00

Let me first make a plug for the funniest movie of the summer (so far, Tropic Thunder looks pretty good). Get Smart with Steve Carrell is really as funny as we all hoped it would be. He and Anne Hathaway have great chemistry, Dwayne (the Rock) Johnson is a very good actor and the three of them light up the screen with laughs. I highly recommend this film.

Now for the cream of the crop. The Dark Knight. First a little history. I love Batman. I Grew up in a home where Batman was always turned off in favor of Saved By the Bell, so there has always been a sense of "rule breaking" when I get to watch Batman. The first movie that I saw when I got home from my mission was "Batman Begins". Kelly and I just returned home from The Dark Knight. This might just be the greatest movie that I have ever seen! It is deep, engaging, and inspiring.

Heath Ledger has the best movie villain performance of all time. It is different than Jaws, or the Silence of the Lambs. Those movies scare you, in fact they scare the poop out of you. What made Heath's performance so amazing was that some of the things he said were true. He displayed a part of our minds that no one wants to admit, but exists in all of us, the curiosity of anarchy. I will be surprised if he doesn't win an Oscar for this performance. The world is missing a true artist in his passing. He will be missed.

I was not just Heath's performance that made this movie. All of the actors excelled. The directing was amazing, the script superb, and the application to today's society is unmatched by any other movie. It is relevant in so many levels. It applies to societies fear of each other, this idea that no one can be trusted. It applies to our current presidency, and proves that the will of the people can overcome the unrighteous desires of one man with great power.

I give a warning to any parents with kids that might stumble upon this blog. Do not take any child under the age of 15. The Joker is a different kind of scary, something that kids have never seen before. For the rest of you, enjoy this cinematic feast that is....The Dark Knight.

Orange Julius

2008-07-11T20:45:00.002-06:00

I miss the good ole days of our food court. With the greasy Chinese food and the Sabaro's pizza. Don't forget Orange Julius. I miss it. In it's place we now have a Barnes and Noble, what was wrong with the old one? Anyways. For those of you that miss a Orange Julius, take advantage of the new fruit smoothies at Jack in the Box. They taste just like em! I ate mine this afternoon and Kelly was still full from lunch and so she put hers in the freezer.

After my bike ride this evening, I came home to find Kelly asleep. After I showered, and got hungry again, I noticed her smoothie in the freezer. I am currently drinking it. I can tell you that they taste just like an Orange Julius! If you are going to get one. Get one between 2 and 4. They are half price!

Now I just have to get one in the freezer again before she gets home from work tomorrow.

Handlebars!

2008-07-05T13:18:00.003-06:00

This is my new toy. For those of you that don't remember, I had bought a bike in March of last year, than I met Kelly and no longer had time to ride it, or to pay for it. I have been craving one ever since then and Kelly agreed to let me get one. I got it today and just put my first 15 miles on it. It is a great bike with lots of extras. I will describe the bike for those that might be interested. It is an 07' Specialized Allez Comp. It has carbon rear and front forks, and a carbon seat post. It has zerts (a kind of shock built into the forks). The components are Shimano 105's across the board. It has sealed bearings on the crank, Mavic aerodynamic wheels (the spokes are flat instead of round).
I know how grossed out you probably are about this, but I do in fact wear the spandex shorts with the pad in the butt. It might be weird to you, but they are a life saver. This a picture of my shoes. They are also a great help to biking properly. The shoes allow me to be attached to the bike with a special clip on the bottom. Being attached to the bike allows you to pull up on the crank using your hamstrings rather than just pushing down with your quads and calves. With these I can ride faster for longer, and climb hills much easier.

Here is a view of the clip on the bottom. Walking around on these is a very weird feeling. I have never worn high heels before, but essentially they are backwards. Despite how funny I might look with all of this stuff. I love it!

Which of these things are not like the others?

2008-06-21T08:53:00.002-06:00

This is our 1/2 bathroom on the main floor of our town home. Kelly uses it has her powder room, because I am such a light sleeper that is she were to use the upstairs bathroom, she would wake me up whenever she flipped the lights on or off. I greatly appreciate her doing this for me so that on Friday, and Saturday mornings I can sleep in until....6 (We get up at 4 A.M. at our house). It looks like a typical female's powder room, expect one thing is not like the others. You initially see the following things, blow dryer, brush, comb, make-up bag, hairspray, soap, glasses, contact case, lotion, hair accessories (don't get me started on bobby-pins, they are like cock roaches, they multiply, and are always in the weirdest places...i.e. kitchen cupboards, scripture cases, in the PRINTER.)

Do you see the one thing out of place?

The empty cereal bowl! Corn flakes! I got up at 7 today, and got on the computer and when I got up to use the bathroom, I was washing my hands and face and found.........breakfast. I know that women are good at multi-tasking but the last time I ate cereal I remember it being a two handed breakfast item. How do you use a hair straightener and eat cereal at the same time? My mom and my wife were talking the other day about how much it hurts to get burnt by heated hair grooming tools, and how men would never understand. It is true, I will probably never understand. I also know that if you expect to not burn yourself while doing your hair and eating cereal at the same time, you might want to lower you expectations, or just get up earlier????

Just Like Mike

2008-06-19T20:58:00.002-06:00

Ok, basketball fans. I am a little annoyed. For over the last 10 years, Kobe Bryant has been pleading with us to stop comparing him to Michael Jordan. I have read a number of articles about his leadership skills, his style of play, how it isn't like MJ's. Let me point out a few things in Kobe's defense.

#1. He wants to be known as the greatest....has he ever said that he wants to be better than MJ? I have never heard him say that. Being the greatest implies a lot more than being better than just one player.

#2. To many judge Kobe's character after than whole Colorado incident. Look into the case a little more. The girl was crazy! What ever happened to being innocent until proven guilty? The judge threw the case out for a lack of evidence. I have heard people say this "MJ wouldn't ever be in a situation like that". Read the paper folks, MJ just got divorced last year. Kobe might have been on trial but he and his wife didn't break up after colorado.

#3. Look at the league this year. You honestly think that MJ could have played any better than Kobe against that Boston defense. When MJ was in the league, it was weak. There was no competition, there was no talk of throwing out the current seeding system because 12 teams had over 55 wins in ONE CONFERENCE!

#4. Rules have changed, for most (all 6 rings came in this period) of MJ's career the zone defense was ILLEGAL. I think that change in rules is a great change, it increased difficulty in the league and forced coaches to coach.

#5. MJ had four years of college, and entered a league that was looking for a star. The league had talent then. Drexler, Barkley, Ewing, Stockton, Malone, Kemp and Payton. Just to name a few. Now look at the league. Garnett, Pierce, Allen, (all on one team. Doesn't the big three scare you more than Pippen, Jordan and.....Brian Grant). Lets look at other teams. Duncan, Parker, Ming, Mcgrady, Deng, Howard, Paul, Durant, Nowitski, Nash, Marion, Kidd, Shaq, Wade, Williams, Boozer, Billups, James, Iverson, Anthony, Heinrich, Butler, Arenas, Artest, Gay, and Kobe. Get my point. If you put MJ in the league at the same time as Kobe, he would get lost in the shuffle just as easily as Kobe does when he has a bad game, he gets thrown aside because someone else had an amazing night.

Trying to compare Kobe to MJ reminds me a lot of ABC's failed sitcom "Cavemen". It makes sense of paper, but when you actually try to make it work, it is a waste of time. Kobe will never be MJ, and guess what MJ will never be Kobe.

This year in sports!

2008-06-18T15:34:00.002-06:00

For me the year of sports starts in September and ends in June. It all starts with Football, the greatest of all sports, then in October you get to watch the world series (the only baseball worth watching). Football, both college and pros go into January. The NBA starts to take full swing in February and goes until June. Throw in March Madness and you have a full load of sports to watch. This year has been one to remember. Here are the highlights.

Pro Football (my favorite!): The league is cracking down on Athlete's behavior off the field, leaving 4 NFL players without a job for all of last year and only 1 of those four have any prospect of getting his career back (Pacman Jones). The competition was fierce, in the AFC that is. The NFC was weak as usual, with the only real strength was the late blooming seahawks who crumbled in the playoffs due to the pansy Sean Alexander. The other NFC surprise was the Vikings, Adrian Peterson took the league by storm setting a new single game rushing record.

The real news was the God like Patriots. They went undefeated in the regular season, rolled over all of their playoff opponents, and then LOST to the giants in the superbowl. To hear of this, you might think that the Patriots would be somewhat proud of the year, but their season has now been tarnished due to their cheating head coach. Their perfect regular season will forever and always have an asterik* (I hate the patriots).

My prediction for next year in the NFL: Patriots, Colts, and Chargers all make a push. They get cocky and you end up with a Vikings vs. Jaguars Superbowl (with the Jaguars beating the Browns in the AFC championship game).

NCAA (football): No complaining about the BSC this year. Michigan was HORRIBLE losing to Appalachian State. LSU was the best team in the country and proved it! The draft year was pretty weak overall.

NCAA (basketball): Who doesn't love March Madness? Memphis is turning into a power. Duke played better this year, but still they are showing coach K's weakness. UNC was the expected winner, but lost to Kansas. I predict that UNC will take it next year, they have all of their players returning.

Baseball: The red sox brought some pride to the Boston area, just to have is crushed by the loser and cheating patriots.

NBA: This year was historic. Never has the league been so competitive, one night of play towards the end of this last season changed 6 of the 8 playoff seeds in the western conference. We were blessed with an epic NBA finals, The Lakers and the Celtics. The Celtics ending up embarrassing the Lakers in a Game 6 blowout. Now that the Celtics and Red Sox have won, it brings the Boston area back to snuff with the patriots mess up.

Prediction: Kobe will win another MVP, but not a championship yet. The Celtics great defense will get picked apart in the off season and I predict that they will lose the season series against the KNICKS. They will make it far in the playoffs, but I am calling either the Pistons or the Magic to take the East. This all depends on what the Pistons do with their roster. In the west. It is either the Jazz or the Hornets. This all depends on what the Jazz do in the draft, will they get a Arvidas Osterbonus, or a real center.

The Olympics will get their own blog, along with my rantings and ravings about Kobe Bryant.

In the Darkness

2008-06-11T20:42:00.002-06:00

Most children and even some adults are afraid of the dark. I used to be one of those kids, and even when I have watched a scary movie, or things seem to be "too quiet" I can still be a little spooked of the dark. Overall, since I am sort of an "adult" now I am no longer afraid of the dark.

The more I think about it, the more I realize how stupid it is to be afraid of the dark. I do understand that not being able to see something but yet at the same time being able to hear it can be frightening, but what if you couldn't hear anything? Would it still be scary? Imagine being in a room with no windows, and everything was black. You couldn't see your hand if you put it an inch from your face. Then imagine that you had a paint brush and a magic can of paint. This paint appeared black in the can (yes I realize that you cant see it, just play along) and it was black on brush, but the minute it hit the wall, floor or ceiling, it was the most glorious and brilliant white you have ever seen!

Whenever we have darkness, in our dreams, in our relationships, in our work, in our minds, we have the ability to turn it all around. During high school I discovered this amazing ability my mind had. I could control my dreams. Before this time, I would have a nightmare and I would talk in my sleep, thinking that I all I wanted was for the dream to end. I would wake up scared, and in a cold sweat. Eventually I started to control my dreams. I was Superman, Jesus, and Bill Gates all rolled into one. I could stop a bullet, raise the dead, and buy anything I wanted. This continues to be a very useful tool today.

I normally am not a very sentimental person, I rarely think about the past mostly thinking "why would I want to relive the past? It wasn't that good?" For years this was my sentiment. If I am sitting and watching a beautiful sunset, I would rather look forward to the next great moment than to sit and pine for the moment that just passed.

I am a light sleeper, it takes me almost an hour most nights to fall asleep. During this hour I don't help myself sleep by having the same forward thinking that I talked about in the paragraph above. I think about the next day, what I am going to do every hour of every day and how I am going to do it. It is very useful to having an effective day, but often times it gets me wound up. Lately I have been asking myself this question? Where were you a year ago? If you would have asked me that question a year ago I would have ignored the answer due to the fact that my life was not fulfilling. Now if you ask me that question, I have a different story.

A year ago I was trying to sleep at my brothers house in Utah. I was about to get on an airplane, and take the biggest step of progression in my life. I was about to propose! I was nervous and excited, mostly excited. Kelly and I spent the night on a riverboat cruise in the Mississippi River. The air was warm and moist, the food was amazing, the sunset was the most brilliant I had ever seen. The company wasn't bad either ;). It was a monumental day, with repercussions that will sound through eternity.

Bring on the darkness. Each night I can sit in bed and lay awake and ask myself "where was I a year ago?". I no longer have to be afraid that the answer is a single guy, sitting around with his roommates eating pizza on a Friday night because we couldn't get dates. I may not be able to remember exactly what I was doing a year ago. I may have just been sitting at home watching TV, but the difference is that Kelly was with me. I can sit in that dark room, paintbrush in hand, and paint a picture of a year ago without fear or regret. I can recreate a masterpiece of a year ago, were a simple family dinner or trip to the grocery store is more magnificent that any painting can justify. I love my wife.

Bring on the darkness, bring it on.

I hope this guy got fired!

2008-06-06T11:02:00.002-06:00

I realize that they were trying to catch the drama of the moment in this historic NBA finals game, but this camera man caught more than anyone wanted. For once I thought to myself, that I wish I didn't have my new and amazing TV.

Locked In

2008-06-06T10:44:00.002-06:00

I attribute my lack of blogs to my new job. I spend hours in a truck, running from the truck to the house and back again. Nothing exciting really happens, except to me. My truck has had the crap kicked out of it by the previous driver. It smells funny, the alignment is beyond repair, and the sliding bulk head door is broken.

(Pictures will be coming shortly) The doors look like any other set of doors. They have a spring pulley system that opens and closes them. The problem with these doors is that the wheels that alloy the doors to move get stuck sometimes. This normally isn't a big deal, when you are inside the cab of the truck. On the other hand, it can be very scary when you are in the BACK OF THE TRUCK!

On Monday, I was in the back of the truck, rearranging my load to keep it from banging around and potentially spilling. While I was back there, I heard the familiar sound of the bulk head doors closing all by themselves. I didn't think much about it, because the doors only get stuck 10% of the time. I should have cared much more than I did. They shut, and I looked up at the wheel in the runner. I already knew from looking at it, that it was stuck. I tried to open the doors with brute force. Stainless steel is a very strong material. I tried wedging the end of a hand truck in the doors and working the doors open. I tried opening the hatch in the back of the truck, which has also been broken before.

All this time, I could hear my cell phone ringing in the cab as my office tried to contact me. I would reach my hand out of the door as far as I could and I was still feet away from being able to grasp my phone. It was very frustrating. I was going to be forced to kick the back doors open, breaking the doors in the process. As I was getting ready to do this, I noticed my junk tool box in the back of the truck. Hoping and praying, I found a tool, a pair of scissors. I won't go into the dumb details, but I was able to use that pair of scissors to get myself out.

All in all, I spent about an hour in the back of the truck. It was the start of a very long day, as when I got home, I had a fever which lasted until late Tuesday morning (while I was working, it finely broke). My truck is in the shop being fixed as I write this very blog.

Too long!

2008-05-25T22:41:00.002-06:00

Well folks, I know that it has been forever! The last month has been very busy. It takes a long time to learn how to be a milk man. I have now successfully managed to memorize the locations of over 800 homes in the Idaho Falls area working 10-11 hour days five days a week. As of two weeks ago, I started to do the route by myself. I found my work day shortening each week, to 10 hours, the 9 hours, and now I am pushing for 8 hours a day this week. I am no longer going to work Friday's (having a 3 day weekend every week is awesome).

During the last month some very funny things happened. Here is a list of some of the best!

1. My entire family was driving in the car in the Drive thru of Sonic, we were ordering ice cream. My dad pulled up to the menu, rolled down is window, while simultaneously, Staci was making some too much noise and so my dad yelled at her QUIET! He happened to yell this at the same time, the young lady came on to take our order. The microphone turned quiet, and a couple minutes later a older gentleman got on the phone, whom I am assuming was the manager. I like to think that my Dad made the girl cry.

2. I don't want this to be arrogant or anything, but one night when Staci and her friend, Ian, were over and were playing games with Kelly and me, I was rather hyper, and in my excitement, I exclaimed "I thought all pigs were bacon"! It is true that not all pigs are made into bacon, but I am sure that they all wish they were. Bacon is the greatest of all meats.

3. For all of those that doubt that having a HDTV is really all that different that the piece of crap thing sitting in your living room right now, you are in denial. HDTV really is that much better (we just got one), the sound really is amazing, and you are running out of excuses not to get one. Don't wait too long or you might miss the NBA finals on an HDTV, where you will get the chance to see the spit flying out of Phil Jackson's mouth when he whistles (yes you really can see it).

Milk Man Bryan!

2008-04-10T23:03:00.003-06:00

That right kiddies, after a year as the general manger of the Reed's Dairy store, and 2 months as Alan's personal assistant I have already moved on. I am still at the dairy and I have taken on the calling as a milk man. It is something that I am very familiar with, I have done routes in the past and have been spending the last month helping Alan to develop the new software that we are going to be using.

I will now only work 4 days a week, between 7 and 8 hours a day and make much more money. I will be able to graduate in less than 4 years (from now) and I don't have to worry about taking out loans. It will be a great thing for Kelly and I. I can promise all of you that truly the Lord takes care of those that give even just a little bit to him.

I never thought twice about paying tithing before my mission. I never really had a calling that I felt I was doing something important. My strong and noble wife and I have never missed a tithing check, have never purposely missed a day of church to get our of our calling. We try hard to read our scriptures, and I try hard to get my home teaching done. I am far from perfect on most of those things, but I can already tell you that the blessings that Kelly and I have received in return far out those things that we have given.

The Lord has made us promises in the scriptures. They are promises for us to receive blessings and revelation. These blessings aren't merely something that we are given, but rather, something that we are entitled too! All we have to do is reach out and grab it through obedience. If you need something, try giving to the Lord first and see what he will do for when you least expect it.

The Season

2008-03-31T22:17:00.002-06:00

Saturday was the final day of my run as the coach of the Singles branch basketball team. It was a great experience.

We had our ups and downs. We came back to win games being down by 10. We beat teams by 31,33, and 35 points. We lost two close ones by 1 and 2, and 3 points. Some games we had 12 guys, other times we had 5 or 6. Either way the guys played hard, they left it all on table and finished with a 6 and 4 record, losing in the semifinal game of the tournament.

Here is my tribute to all of my players.

Mikey: My assistant coach! He called most of the guys, washed the jersey's, never missed a practice, read more of the play book than I did, and eventually beat me at one on one.

Corey: I lovingly called him midget towards the end of the season. He is my fiery point guard, that if only 2 feet taller would destroy every big man in the stake. Corey in all of his passion was the most willing to learn and follow.

Brad: Brad and I played on the court last season. He started at point towards the end of the season, setting a great example for Corey. His slow spin on his shot made you never think that he would take the ball to hole and finish with his left hand.

Steve: Steve has one of the purest shots I have ever seen on a basketball court. Very few people know the game better than Steve or have as much as a desire to be better at it.

Ken: Even with a short season, this man was a stud. He played more minutes that most of my players, ran the zone defense down low perfectly with Sam and always caught his opponents off guard with his strength.

Sam: Not only did Sam make us the most fashionable team in the stake with the sweet jersey's he brought, but when playing zone defense, he was the perfect example of communication and execution.

Ryan: Being the coach, I take the liberty to name Ryan MVP of our team. He was very quiet all season, was by far the super star of our team but was our greatest asset. He had the hops to play down low. He had the speed to play up top. He used the baseline like no other person in the stake. He never questioned me, or the refs, he never complained, and never missed practice. It was the saddest day of the season when he missed our final two games of the tournament. Congratulations Ryan, you are the MVP.

Some people will not understand this blog, most of you probably didn't even get this far in reading it, but let me tell you something. Nothing is quiet as satisfying as seeing your players sitting on the sideline of the championship game, not complaining that they didn't win, or that they weren't playing. They were talking about playing on Wednesday, like we normally do. They were laughing and joking. They had left it all on the floor. They knew how important it was to play hard and to give it their all, and they did, and they knew they had. They had nothing to be ashamed of. They are all amazing players, but even more important than that, they are amazing people.

The Tastes of the Periodic Table

2008-03-09T12:21:00.002-06:00

Kelly and I are at an impass about our toothpaste. No matter which one we use, they never have a satisfying aftertaste for Kelly, where I care more about the clean feeling than I do about the taste. I believe that I have found the answer to our problems.

I soon realized that the one key ingredient in most quality toothpastes is that flouride is the main ingredient. How can something that is an element on the periodic table have a great taste? In chemistry class, I never remember working with chemicals and thinking to myself, "this calcium smells so good, I wish I could eat a big spoonful of it!".

Most things on the periodic table will never in fact be eaten. I have never eaten a neon lightbulb, I have inhaled helium, but the taste in no way can be described as "yummy". In fact, most of the elements would probably have some weird degenerative effect on your children. If I was in fact going to eat an element, I would like to try Boron. Besides the fact that Boron has an excellent name, it sounds less harmful than other elements such as Radon, or any other isotope.

Soon after my discovery I started a converstation with my brother in law, Steve, about the same subject. We tried to remember some of the elements that we knew and then proceeded to find examples of foods that contain a large quantity of the element. We were having very little if any success until we stumbled upon Iron. The first thing that came to my mind was red meat. Thinking of a juicy and tender medium rare steak with Garlic mashed potatoes was making my mouth water. Just as I was about to open my salavating mouth to share my discovery, Steve proceed to say two words. Grape...Nuts....(yes, that funky cereal with the name that makes no sense!)

My mouth then became very dry again as I imagined the small, dry, and rock hard cereal that is named after the seeds found in grapes! He then went on to explain that in the past his doctor had told him to eat a diet high in Iron and had suggested Grape Nuts as an excellent source of it. I tried to shrug off the outlandish comment (I loathe cereal) and proceeded to explain my perferred source, steak! Steve seemed unmoved by the comment. Is it true that he would rather eat Grape Nuts over a steak? The audacity of that assumption is horrifying. I will probably never ask, for I am truly afraid of the answer.

Interior design!

2008-02-26T10:18:00.002-07:00

Haven't you walked through the front door of your home and thought, "i need to put a table right in front of this door"? I know that I always have, so just this week, I did it. We now have a large oval dining table blocking any possible exit from the front door to our house.

After the table was in its new and very interesting location, my incredible design skills thought to myself, "A old blue rocker recliner would be the perfect accent to our new table location!" It matches the decor nicely and is perfectly located to catch anyone that would fall down the stairs. The view from the chair is one of majesty as it looks directly into the 9 foot tall vinyl fence no less than 15 feet away!

Feel free to email with your design questions, I am more than happy to help!

Remains

2008-02-12T19:54:00.002-07:00

Many people, much like myself are somewhat embarrassed by the music they listened too in high school.

On a recent trip to Utah, I pulled out my "old" cd wallet and flipped through the sheets. Very little was any good. Most of it was just country crap that I had been brainwashed into liking. Eventually I found one to listen too.

The first song started to play nicely. The second song skipped like little girls playing hop scotch. I pulled it out the player and flipped it over. It had a defined, sticky finger print on the outside edge. Doing the manly thing, I didn't get my water bottle out and clean it off. I licked the remains off the CD. One lick would not suffice, and after the second I realized what it was I was licking off. It was ice cream mix from over 3 years ago when I used to make ice cream. I was surprised how well the flavor was still present after that length of time.

Victory!

2008-02-01T08:28:00.000-07:00

Victory is sweet. I don't know very many people that don't like to win at things. Especially men.

A year ago, I was the starting point guard for the single sward basketball team. I loved it. The team played hard, had very few players, but didn't win a whole lot.

Over the course of the last year, some return missionaries have come home that are good basketball players. I on the other hand, can no longer play due to the fact that I got married!

Instead of playing, I am now coaching. We have real practices every week, and now have gobs of people on our rotation. Our first game was 3 weeks ago. I had to work and missed that game. Our team came back from 16 down to win the game. I wish I could have been there. The next game I was ready for my coaching debue but the other team didn't show up (I will take the W's however they come).

Last night was our third game. A nasty storm was rolling its way through southeastern Idaho and snowed in two of our guys. Even without those two, we still had eleven guys to play. It was great.

We started the game on a 14-2 run and never looked back. The final score had us winning by 30 points. Victory is good, but pure annihilation is so sweet. Even winning by 30 points, we still didn't use our best weapon, our age! I could have subbed the entire bench every 3 minutes and told the guys to run the other team into the dirt. Instead we played patient ball, used the paint and still won by 30 points!

We played well, but still not perfectly. There are other teams in the league that will exploit our weakness, which is our aggressive defense. Other teams will get our players fouled out, and kill our best weapon. Next week is a true test, the ward I live in, Westview.

A phone call

2008-01-26T15:06:00.000-07:00

I recently received a promotion at work. I am my boss's personal assistant. I do what he doesn't have time to do. In the time I am not busy, I help the office staff stay caught up on their work. Part of these duties include answering the phones.

A week ago, I got a phone call from man named Walt. He had a great voice, very kind and calming. He very patiently asked me if we had any openings in the milk barn for a disabled employee to work for a couple hours a week. I knew the answer, it would be know. I knew that I shouldn't leave the note of the call. I should have just thrown it away.

Walt had one of the hardest and most noble jobs I could think of. How many times had he called a company, how many times had those companies said no. I didn't want to be a no on his list. It wasn't my call. I had no choice. Hoping for a miracle, I left the message for my boss. Just to watch him come in, see the message and then give it back to me, almost annoyed at the very idea that I didn't know better than to just say no.

Someday in the future if I have a chance, I will call Walt back and offer my services to help him meet the needs of special human being. Someone that might not comprehend what is going on or even remember working at all. The only advantage is that I will remember, I will find peace rather than dissapointment.

Blindside! (Writing assignment in class/ Good sacrement talk).

2008-01-20T17:30:00.000-07:00

If I were to openly ask the congregation what was going to happen at 1:00 this afternoon, I am sure that I would get a variety of answers. Some would say, taking a nap. Others would be eating lunch. Some are still in meetings. Then a few of us, will be watching the undefeated Patriots play against Ladainian Tomlinson and the San Diego Chargers.

For the few football junkies in the congregation along with myself will know that the Ladainian Tomlinson mentioned above is also known as LT. Ladainian Tomlinson is not the original LT in the history of football. In the 1980’s, quarterbacks in the NFL were being ripped apart by Lawrence Taylor. Lawrence was bigger, stronger, and faster than anyone that has ever played the game at the linebacker position.

To give you an idea of how he played the gamed, I will quote from his own words how he described his style of play.

“I don’t like to just wrap up the quarterback,” He explains. “I really try to make him see seven fingers when they hold up three. I’ll drive my helmet into him, or if I can, I’ll bring my arm up over my head and try to axe the guy in two. So long as the guy is holding the ball, I intend to hurt him…If I hit the guy right, I’ll hit a nerve and he’ll feel electrocuted, he’ll forget for a few seconds that he’s on a football field.”

Lawrence Taylor change the game of football forever. He made teams plan around him alone. Many teams tried many different ways to counter is style of play. Teams tried bringing an extra tight end on the line. They would assign the running back to block him. Both of these efforts failed, Lawrence was too fast, too strong, and too intimidating.

One failed attempt to block Lawrence was by the Washington Redskins. The following is a quote of the experience from the person who was attacked, a quarterback named Joe Theismann. He says.

“Where Taylor is at the start of the play, of course, isn’t the problem. It’s where he ends up. “When I dropped back,” say Theismann, “The first thing I still did was to glance over my shoulder to see if he was coming. If he dropping back in coverage, a sense of calm came over me. If he was coming, I had a sense of urgency.”

“From the snap of the ball Theismann has lost sight him. He doesn’t see Taylor carving a wide circle behind his back; he doesn’t see Taylor outrun his blocker upfield and then turn back down; and he doesn’t see the blocker diving, frantically, at Taylor’s ankles. He doesn’t see Taylor leap, both arms over his head, and fill the sky behind him. Theismann prides himself on his ablility to stand in the pocket and disregard his fear. He thinks this quality is a prerequisite in a successful NFL quarterback. “When a quarterback look at the rush,” he says, “his career is over.” Theismann played in 163 straight games, a record for the Washington Redskins. He’s led his team to two superbowls, and won one. He’s thirty-six years old. He’s certain he still has a few good years left in him. He’s wrong. He has left than half a second.”

Theismann’s career was over with that hit. He suffered a compound fracture in both his phibia and his tibia. One of the paramedics that took him off the field said the injury was more fitting on a world war battle field than a football game.

In the duration of Taylors career he created two things that remain the same in the game today. He created the statistic known as the quarterback sack, and the term known as blindsiding! The hit someone from the side of the field that they can’t see you coming.

Football has never been the same. Eventually one coach created the offensive strategy to counter this superhuman force. His name was Bill Walsh. He created the west coast offense. An offense built off of working in limited space and time. The success of this offense relied on two positions. One was a smart quarterback, with an accurate arm that was not afraid to work with what he was given.

The other was the left tackle. He had to smarter, faster, more conditioned than any person on the field. He protected the quarterbacks blind side. If he failed, the team lost. If he succeeded as the tackles that played for Walsh, they won superbowl’s.

The left tackle position is the second highest paid position in football. Trailing only to the quarterback. The most drafted position in the first round of the NFL draft is at the tackle position.

No comes the religious connection.

We are the quarterbacks in the football games of our lives. We have been given the plays to beat our opponents from the scriptures. It is our responsibility to execute. To face the rush and make the pass. We have been called to this earth in the last dispensation, or the final quarter so to speak to close out the game. Those before us have played nobly and have left us in a great position to succeed. It is now our time not just to do our best, but to be the best, to win.

Just as we have been held back in the last dispensation, our opponent, Satan has saved his best for last. He has linebackers, bigger, stronger, and more determined than Lawrence Taylor. His goal isn’t just to make us lose the game, but to lose ourselves to his cause. He is the master of intimidation, he wants us to doubt or potential and the choke under the pressure.

Fortunately we have the greatest left tackle ever created to protect us from the blitz’s satan will call upon us. That Tackle is called revelation as given to us from a living prophet. I know it is hard to picture president Hinckley as a football player, but he is indeed smarter, faster, and conditioned for the battle ahead. He can predict the blitz from the line of scrimmage, signal to us what our opponent is planning and help us win the game. He can’t play the game for us, but his presence is the difference maker. With him standing up Satan at the line of scrimmage, we have the advantage.

I will now give you quotes, from the last five talks that President Hinckley has given in General Conference. Is he letting us know what our opponent is going to do or is currently doing. If we close our ears to crowd noise in the stadium of worldliness, and listen closely to our faithful and wise left tackle we will see he is truly the spokesman for our father in heaven.

Be not quick to anger:

Now, my dear brethren, in closing I plead with you to control your tempers, to put a smile upon your faces, which will erase anger; speak out with words of love and peace, appreciation, and respect. If you will do this, your lives will be without regret. Your marriages and family relationships will be preserved. You will be much happier. You will do greater good. You will feel a sense of peace that will be wonderful.

Be Clean:

In a world that wallows in filth, be clean—in language, in thought, in body, in dress.

To each of you I say, be clean in your language. There is so much of filthy, sleazy talk these days. Failure to express yourself in language that is clean marks you as one whose vocabulary is extremely limited. When Jehovah wrote on the tablets of stone, He said to the children of Israel, "Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain; for the Lord will not hold him guiltless that taketh his name in vain" (Exodus 20:7).

The Lord has reinforced that commandment in words of modern revelation: "Remember that that which cometh from above is sacred, and must be spoken with care, and by constraint of the Spirit" (D&C 63:64).

Be clean in thought. Said the Lord, "Let all things be done in cleanliness before me" (D&C 42:41).

Rise up:

It is plainly evident from these statistics that young women are exceeding young men in pursuing educational programs. And so I say to you young men, rise up and discipline yourself to take advantage of educational opportunities. Do you wish to marry a girl whose education has been far superior to your own? We speak of being "equally yoked." That applies, I think, to the matter of education.

The need for greater kindness:

There is no end to the good we can do, to the influence we can have with others. Let us not dwell on the critical or the negative. Let us pray for strength; let us pray for capacity and desire to assist others. Let us radiate the light of the gospel at all times and all places, that the Spirit of the Redeemer may radiate from us.

If ye are prepared, ye shall not fear:

We can so live that we can call upon the Lord for His protection and guidance. This is a first priority. We cannot expect His help if we are unwilling to keep His commandments. We in this Church have evidence enough of the penalties of disobedience in the examples of both the Jaredite and the Nephite nations. Each went from glory to utter destruction because of wickedness.

Edward Teller said “When you come to the end of all the light you know, and it's time to step into the darkness of the unknown, faith is knowing that one of two things shall happen: Either you will be given something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly.”

The work of salvation and exaltation is the most difficult work of all. It will stretch our capacity to love, to nurture, to excel, to fail. It will leave us with scars, it will never be perfect on our own. It is a work, we cannot finish. It is a work we must leave to the masters hand. When we feel too weak to continue and the master comes and offers his relief, gain your breath and offer your help in return, he never forgot us, he never turned his back on us. We cannot forget him either, we cannot turn our backs on him.

Luckly I only payed $20 dollars!

2008-01-20T17:10:00.000-07:00

I am in the course of starting school again. It is a very slow process due to the fact I don' t have financial aid and I am still poor.

I am taking an English class (my major is English). We had to buy two books. One is called "this I believe". The other is called "Thinking about Thinking". The first is great! I have almost read the entire thing, due to the fact that it is great writing.

The other is a book of essay's put together by BYU-Idaho. I looked through it, read some entries and am not annoyed. It is already bad enough that I spend 112 dollars a credit to take a class that is offered for free from an institute and transfers just the same. Now I have spent $20 on a compilation of conference talks! I love the truth found in them, but they aren't helping me write! The only valuable thing in the whole book is the last 5 pages. I would have paid $20 dollars for those 5 pages alone.

Give me Walden, Emerson, Thoreau, Shakespeare, and Hemingway. Give me history! Give me unbiased learning. There is so much I don't know, so much I hunger to learn! I love to teach the gospel and I would love to be able to teach my children how much of the world and our history has affected our religious beliefs.

I guess if I want it, I will have to learn it on my own.

Taste

2007-12-29T13:38:00.001-07:00

Mediocrity is the greatest disease in our time. Too many people feel "comfortable" being "normal". Life has nothing to do with our comfort but rather our growth, growing transitions to eternal comfort.

Too many people accept being mediocre because they have never tasted greatness, have never been the best as something and realized that the anything but greatness is a failure. I am not just talking about your career. This extends into all aspects of life. Being the best husband and father, neighbor, and friend. Being the best at your hobbies. In your church activities.

I love the NIKE commmercial with Lebron James. "You don't want to be me.....You want to better". I don't expect to be perfect in this life, but I will never stop trying. The minute I stop trying, and am happy with where and what I am in life, I have been consumed by the plague....the plague of mediocrity.

Payback is certainly a ...........

2007-12-26T21:55:00.000-07:00

For years my family has held a Christmas Eve party with a great family...the Bodily's. We have all gotten older, some of us have gone on missions, gotten married and had kids. Even with all of this change, we still manage to have a great and memorable time.

Each year we play the same two games! One is the candy bar game. It is very simple but proves just how much our bodies crave large amounts of sugar and preservatives. The next game is the highlight. We play a white elephant game. Last year in my pure ignorance I gave a autographed photo of myself. The lucky winner of this one day priceless gift was Kelly, this could have been very funny for her if she had been single. Unfortunately both her and her husband were nothing but dismayed.

Nothing was quite as climatic this year as my giving of the children's book "Everyone Poops" buy the Bodily father, Kevin, who insisted that the illustrated novel should be on display in his office waiting room. A close second was when my new bride of 3 months picked her gift and found nothing more than the most fought over present from last year.........my photo! As the gift was opened Wade exclaimed that he had stored that gift in the trunk of his car for a year to get rid of the gift. I normally would have been offended that the gift was treated with such carelessness, but am glad the gift finely found a much more appreciated home.

Hands

2007-11-13T11:25:00.000-07:00

Do you pop your knuckles? I have been popping my knuckles for as long as I can remember. I was laying in bed this morning and found myself staring at my hands.

The tips of my index fingers turn out towards the outside of my hands. None of my other fingers do this, it looks rather odd. I thought to myself how this could have happened and came to one conclusion.

While in the womb my twin sister (being the bully that she is) pulled on the tips of my fingers to offer a mark a distinction between the two of us without realizing that our reproductive organs provide a sufficient enough mark.

Would my life be different if my fingers were straight? Could I use my index finger to pick my nose? Could I type faster? Would that funky spin on my basketball shot go away? Could I develop a skill of plucking my uni brow like my father has? The biggest what if is...........would I not be so self conscience of my hands? (don't even get me started on my toes!)

Blow Harder

2007-11-10T13:57:00.000-07:00

My wife has been sick for almost a week. Nothing can be worse than being sick. Not only do you leak and cant breath or hear, but you feel worthless. You call in sick to work and have to change all sort of plans.

Growing up I always had a way of blowing things out of proportion, so my parents followed the "buck up" approach. I didn't miss a day of High School due to illness and have never called in sick to work (actually being sick that is).

I don't know how many of you know my dad, he is as gentle as a teddy bear but looks more like a grizzly. He is big and has He-man like strength. His sneezes can be heard from the backyard and his snores could be heard from the basement.

I remember being sick once as a kid and had a horrible head cold, mucus and teary eyed I was always sniffling the snot back into my head. Sitting on the couch next to my dad watching TV he was getting very tired of the noise. "Don't you know your body is trying to get rid of the snot". He then proceeded to take me to the bathroom and show me how a man blows his nose.

Practice made perfect and soon I was very comfortable blowing my nose. During this same sickness I would sit in the basement and watch tv and blow my nose often. Most of the time I remembered my dad's advice and blew to his satisfaction. Whenever I didn't he would come to the top of the stairs and yell "BLOW HARDER".

This story makes me laugh, and makes me laugh even harder when just a couple of days ago I blew my nose so hard that it started to bleed and all I could think about was that booming voice echoing off the stairwell walls "BLOW HARDER". Thanks dad!

War

2007-11-04T01:19:00.000-07:00

I got done watching the movie "The Last King of Scotland". It is a very interesting film, a little over rated in my opinion, but still one of the more thought provoking films I have seen in a while. As I watched the story unfold of the cruel treatment and murders of the 300,000 Ugandan people, my heart reached back to my mission.

The Minneapolis/St Paul area is the home to nearly a million African refugees, all of which with stories worse than the one in the movie. I have sat in the modest homes and apartments of people from Nigeria. Describing how the genocide there was about quantity. These families laid in the dirt hoping the barrage of bullets would spare there lives, very few did. Almost 4 million people were killed.

James Marube, one of the kindest souls I have met often talked about his family. Life had been so good for them in Liberia. He had two sons and a girl on the way. As a missionary, you just listened to the stories and never asked questions for fear that the answers would haunt you in your sleep. James wasn't even on the wrong side when the civil war started, his roots were with neither tribe and for years this had kept him safe. Eventually both sides became so prideful that if you weren't for their cause than you were against it.

James' home was broken into one night. His head was covered and he was kicked and beaten as he was dragged on the floor. He heard two gunshots and his wifes screams. They uncovered his face when he was too badly beaten to run or resist. They forced him to watch as soldiers took her virtue. Eventually they shot her, once in the belly, killing the child and then once in the head. They then shot James. He should have died, and probably wished that he had. By a miracle his life was spared.

As he shared this with us, I was speechless. What could I have said to him to comfort his pain and grief? I was a missionary that didn't make any money, I was a missionary that was told a million times that the gospel was about sacrifice. I sat wearing one of my two suits, my rockport shoes. When I went back to my apartment, I would probably have mail from my family. I would sit in my easy chair, listen to some music, read my mail and munch on Reese's puffs and then sleep in my bed while James ate mayonaise sandwiches, sat in the dark and then fell asleep on a leaky air mattress that would be empty in the morning. James never complained, while I sat in my apartment and bitched to my companion about I had only received two letters that week. Funny how the only thing left to do is ask....................why?

Nuts

2007-11-04T01:14:00.000-07:00

Summer is over, the stress of my job has nearly all but vanished. It is a good blessing. Being a newlywed it is nice not to be stressed from my job. Unfortunately my expectations of the dairy are never what they seem.

Tonight a big group of people came in. All were related and were very annoying. They tried a million flavors without asking what was in them, only to find out that the majority of them had some form of nut in them (like most ice creams). Each nut filled taste was rejected with a whiny "Ewww...............nuts". Some one asked be if we sold anything that didn't have nuts. My mind was brought back to the segment in RETURN TO ME about the swiss water. I couldn't find any smart-ass comment so I just went back to being annoyed and grumpy.

?

2007-10-30T09:32:00.000-06:00

In business people often say "the customer is always right". I am convinced that whoever thought that up has never done business. Of the course the customer can't always be right, if they always were right than every service provided would always be free! The proper term is that the customer must always "THINK they are right". This requires being very kind and thoughtful in spite of the fact that they have no clue about the situation and you could very easily humiliate them.

A incident like this happened last night at work. A lady had complained about a service and been quite upset. I in turn told my superiors in charge of financing and they cut her a check for an almost ridiculously small amount. Last night she came in gave us the check back, telling us that it was the "principle" of her complaint. I wanted to tear her check up. We noticed our fault and made restitution. I was sort of mad, and thinking about the situation just made things worse. Until I looked closely at the check and realized that she wouldn't have been able to cash it in the first place...............rather than being written to Jennifer, it was written to JEFFIFER. Just say that name out loud. LOL. I want to name someone jeffifer!

So sue me- I hate halloween!

2007-10-28T09:56:00.001-06:00

Growing up, I never really liked Halloween. It was a waste of time to spend days conjouring up a unique costume, and even more wasted time and money to create said costume. When the big day finally came around, it was 25 degrees and you were in full snow suits completely covering your costume to keep warm.

One year when I was a youth, nearing my trick or treating retirement (age 12) I became ill. I was forced to stay home with the lights off and avoid contact with the outside world(darn). In my state of waiting, I became bored. One of the weekends prior to this one was a scout camping trip where I had learned that if you help a plastic bag over a flame, the warm air would get trapped under in and it would float away. Seeing the lit Halloween candle on the table, I wanted to try this again. I searched and searched only to find nothing that would work. Eventually I found something that worked, a small paper bag. Yes you all know what happens when paper meets fire. Give me a break, I was 11.

The bag ignited in flames. Knowing that I was standing on carpet and it would be a bad idea to drop the weapon on the floor, I ran towards the kitchen sink. Moving too fast for the brittle paper, the chunk I was holding broke and the remainder of the game fell on the floor. In either heroics or stupidity I picked the bag off the floor (still flaming) and then proceeded to take it in the kitchen where it burnt my finger and I dropped in on the floor. I took a little cup, put out the fire from the sink and then noticed the bubbles in the floor. I had fried the kitchen floor.

I hardly slept, waiting for my parents to freak out. Nothing happened that night, so in the morning I got up sooner than normal got ready for school and went to the bus stop. I never heard anything from my parents on the subject, until a couple of days later new flooring was installed. To this day I still can't believe I got off for that.

On my mission, I had a freaky experience with a possessed guy. I will leave out the details. Just know that I didn't sleep for weeks. I have plenty of reasons to hate a stupid day of the year, that was originally set up to worship demons and witches. Halloween can eat me.

Irony.

2007-10-13T16:48:00.000-06:00

Today is a day filled with irony, very humbling irony.

I attended the funeral of a recently deceased family friend, Vincent Kamka. He was killed honorably serving our country in Iraq. He was a quiet young man. I never knew Vincent all that well. We went to Scout camp together, and numerous high adventures. He was normally very quiet and reserved but towards the end of each of these outings he would start to open up, showing us all the budding qualities that lead to his most honorable passing.

In May, when Vincent was on leave he came into my work. It had been over 3 years since I had last seem him. We started to talk, discovering my engagement and his service in Iraq. He was comfortable and talkative. Most noticeable was how much he loved what he was doing. His reaction was in my thoughts throughout that day.

Tonight, I am celebrating my best friends 21st birthday. She has had a rough year, but has come out on top with a smile on her face. It is a joyous day, I look forward to going out for dinner and having some good conversation.

I am convinced that in life or in death, love must be the greatest motivator. Vincent's family will be stronger from his noble service and passing. His love will be felt. Traci continues to bless those around her with her smile and positive attitude. Her love will be felt.

How is your love felt?

Bland vs. Boring

2007-09-13T22:40:00.000-06:00

What is worse, to be bland or boring? In the world of food, bland food is something that could be an amazing dish but it lacks a certain ingredient or spice. Boring food is something routine, common or ordinary. Boring foods are normally comfort foods that are tasty such as pork chops, chicken, and the end all be all of boring foods............casserole!
What about a person, would you rather be described as bland or boring. Is a boring person someone defined by the things they do, or being afraid to add to the routine? Is a bland person the person that can't seem to have fun regardless of being at McDonald's or the California coast?
Now the problem is.........what is worse? Would you rather be known for being stuck in a rut, or a downer? Am I bland or am I boring?

Blown Away

2007-09-02T12:48:00.001-06:00

I just finished an almost 80 hour work week. I learned alot in the course of the week. I found out the trick to cleaning the milk seperator, and was once again reminded of how amazing the human body really is.

Towards the end of last night, as the crowd finally dwindled and my mind was pondering the up coming sleep I was going to enjoy. My dedicated boss entered the store and said to me "You had better get YOUR crew some pizza tonight." I have worked for this man for over 5 years. After all this time, I finally realized how far I had come. I started as a peon. My first summer, was full of sore wrists as I scooped for hours. Now, I am the "man" in the store. As I was ready to go to bed last night, I asked myself "are they really my crew?".

As I thought about this question in the shower, I realized how false my idea was. It is true that I know the in's and out's of the store more than most anyone else, but the crew is far from mine. They work for each other. These "kids" might just be teenagers, but for the first time in a long time I saw a stronger and better future in our little Idaho town. They do little favors for each other, without complaint. They stick up for each other. They offer sympathy and advice when they have had a dismal high school day (which is often).

I was blown away last night. The scriptures say that from the mouth of babes, great prophecies will come forth. I realize that a small dairy farm in Idaho isn't really scriptural, but these kids have taught be more than they probably understand.

The truth

2007-09-02T12:46:00.000-06:00

It turns out that my mother used my Loufa to clean my bathroom when I was gone! After hearing this news, my heart went out to the poor Loufa. What did it do to have to diserve such a torteous fate?.............................Have you seen my bathroom? (don't worry, I cleaned it yesterday!)

Loufa!

2007-08-26T04:16:00.000-06:00

When I got back from Minnesota on my last trip, my loufa of 3 years was MIA. I wasn't surprised. It was torn and had pieces falling off. If you pulled it apart and looked at the base it was sort of a greenish gray color. If "living" were a color, it would be the color of this loufa.

Tonight I got home from my 69 hour work week and found a new loufa sitting in the middle of my bathroom floor. What does this mean? Did someone get me the loufa to replace the one that they rudely seperated me from or are they implying that I stink. I will be the first to admit, I don't smell great. I never thought it was that bad. So the next time you buy someone a personal hygiene product, think of the message you are sending. As a stocking stuffer, it can fly but as a random act of kindness it leaves the motive in question.

Hippie!

2007-08-17T23:00:00.001-06:00

At work tonight, I had a couple of people that came in wearing bandana's on there heads. At that point of the night, we were getting busy and I was frequently making visit's from our loading dock into the store. Each time I walked back into the store and I saw this group, I wanted to yell "free love" in honor the apparent tribute that they were making to being a hippie. Luckily I never gave way this temptation and the embarrassment if I had yelled "FREE LOVE" in a small, crowded dairy store own and operated by a bunch of mormons.

Dungeons and Dragons!

2007-08-12T14:56:00.000-06:00

Also a part of my Minnesota trip, was a chance to go to the Mathias family reunion is Lake City, MN. We got up at the crack of dawn, from a thunderstorm filled nights sleep. The Mathias family reunion was a typical family reunion, but if analyzed closly a much more hilarious event. Once we got to the lake, some games were set up and most of the older people got schooled by a team of 8 year olds that still remain unbeaten!

During the duration of the trip, it was Kelly, myself and my two future brothers in law. Sam and Steve. Both Sam and Steve are hilarious guys. Steve is very quiet, and humble but without effort, he can say something that would just have me bowed over laughing. Sam is very different from his siblings, but is also very funny. He is unshockable and will talk about almost anything. Including the multiple discussions that we had about vomit, poop, and farting.

Towards the end of the day, the four of us were sitting at a table in utter exhaustion. When Sam decided that he wanted to play dungeons and dragons! At first I was reluctant to play along with him (no of us had any idea what we were doing, no of us have played it before). It was hilarious, Sam's character was named Timmy, and I was Juan Valdez a bounty hunter looking to track down Han Solo! The entire time, Kelly had her head down on the table shaking it in clear embarrasment. I doubt, I will ever play that game again but the one time I did sure was a good time.

under the bus

2007-08-12T14:41:00.000-06:00

As much as I realize that most of my family and friends are sick of me talking about my upcoming marriage and the activities and feelings that are associated with it, I am sorry. It has comsumed me to a certain extent.

I am in Minnesota this week, my second home. How I love this place, the smell of sticky and humid air molecules. The lush and full, towering trees. It is so different than my home in Idaho. Kelly and I just returned from an interview with her Bishop. To discuss the process of getting married and what needed to happen and when it needed to happen. It felt really good to know that I have already been trying to apply the counsel given to us even before I got it.

As we journeyed back to her notheren suburban home to do the traditional Sunday "loafing". I got a text from my sister, expressing that she wished I was there (in Idaho) because my older sister was in town and our trips have made it almost impossible for the whole family to get together. I realized right then, I was throwing something under the bus.

At first I was sad, thinking to myself. Did I miss my last chance for the good old times? Then I realized that what I was thinking was idiotic! Why would I feel badly for making my new wife and family my top priority in my life? Life moves on, things change. Why fight the future? I will embrace this change for the good of myself, and Kelly and most importantly our eternal salvation.

Nothing is being thrown under the bus. The whole family will be together in less than a month, for my wedding. Then again in December for Christmas and who knows how many more Christmas's after that. I am sorry to those family members that might feel betrayed or thrown under the bus. In a book I am reading, I found a line that descibes my situation to the T.

"People are only this happy when they are about to have something taken away from them."

I have never been happier, or more focused. Yet at the same time, my relationship with my family will be taken away from me. It is a chance I am willing to take, or I should say that it is an opporunity that I am willing to take.

35 W

2007-08-03T23:53:00.000-06:00

I have a hard time calling myself an Idahoan. Living in and loving Minnesota for the two years I was there I almost wish that I could call myself a Minnesotan. Until I saw the news on Wednesday. A bridge inbetween Minneapolis and St. Paul collapsed. I was in Minnesota in June. I had driven across the 35 W-mississippi river bridge on my way to propose to my girlfriend. I had driven across that bridge on my way to the mission home, and zone conference.

This bridge connected two major mid-western cities. Cities full of noble, brave, and kind people. A bridge, 40 years old that had stoop up to freezing cold winters. It had withstood torrential rain and blistering heat. That bridge was truly minnesotan, it endured 40 years of crap before it finally had enough of it.

As sad as the tragic collapse is, I am happy to know that it happened in such a great state. This state wont skip a beat. Life will move on, no one will whine, no one will forget. They will strictly just be better because of it.

This is why I have a hard time calling myself a Minnesotan. I am an even weaker bridge. As I move from one area to another, sometimes I fall and collapse. I just hope and pray that my two years will rub off on me and I will ge as strong as the 35 W bridge. I pray for the injured, I pray for the families of the lost. I thank you for your courage and example. Now I ask you to pray for me.

I still think he's gay!

2007-07-28T01:58:00.000-06:00

Can I just say how thankful I am to have the "Harry Potter" series over and done with. I read the first book. I got sick of the fake creatures and unrealistic magic bumbo jumbo and stopped. How glad I am that I did. I am in the process of reading a collection of writing my Ralph Waldo Emerson. Rowling might be creative, might be a great business lady but has done nothing to promote literature in the world. She wrote books, kids books at that. Why do we frown of adults when they dress like teenagers, but when adults read books tailored to kids we don't say a word? Hold up the book that I am reading right now, no one might know a thing that Emerson wrote but atleast they will know his name. When you hold up a Potter book in 10 years, most people will remember a lightning scare and the name of the actor that played in the movies. I heard someone say that Rowling is a literary genious the other day and it made me throw up in my mouth a little.

I will stick by my preferred ending of "Harry Potter". In some fight scene, he breaks down in tears. Everyone stops and looks at him. He then admits that he is a flaming gay. In shock both his friends and enemies combine forces, capture him and burn him at the stake due to the conservative brainwashing that occured at the school they attended. (P.S. I loved spoiling the ending for everyone!)

Care Bear Stare!

2007-07-22T15:51:00.000-06:00

It was my birthday this week. It was a very quiet but very satisfying birthday. Dinner was good, we had some good laughs and creamy chocolate pie. Seeing that I am getting married in less than 2 months, most of my gifts were very practical. Gift cards, and cash. All of which are very pleasing. My brother, wrapped a card that had money in it. He used "Care Bear" wrapping paper. When he called and asked me what I thought about the gift, I commented on his selection of wrapping paper. It was a fun little conversation that we had, which has in turn prompted this blog.

I must admit that growing up I was never a huge care bear fan. Most of my television was done longing for Batman, but were destroyed by two older sisters that wanted to watch "Saved by the Bell". After googling "care bears" I now know the following. The main purpose of the Care Bears is to spread goodness and happy thoughts to the entire world. They live in the clouds, have meetings at a city hall type building. In each episode, something happens. They go down to earth and find some depressed or troubled kid. They do good things for him and her. Then he becomes happy. Towards the end of each episode, someone is too stubborn to change and the Care Bears unite in one of the greatest weapons known to man. The "CARE BEAR STARE". As my sister said earlier today, "anything is cool when it shoots out of your belly".

The Care Bear Stare always works. The evil is always defeated, but what would happen if they missed? What is they did the "stare" on someone that wasn't evil, just having a bad day? I almost imagine that they would turn into a puppy, or some other innocent woodland creature. Or would it just give people a false sense of reality? Is the "stare" the reason we suffer from really dumb girls (most blonde's), and guys that wear girl pants? Are there degrees of the "stare"? If you have too many Bears in the "stare" is it more powerful than if you have few?

These are all questions that I would love to ask the marijuana smoking, graphic designer that came up with this story as he sat in a tent in the pouring rain in central park protesting the ethics of killing whales in far eastern countries? In my opinion, I think that the greatest effects of the Care Bear Stare in today's society is................being................gay.

I am not gay and have no intentions to be. So on behalf of today's world, I thank the Care Bears for their contributions of gayness into our society. Without you we wouldn't be developing more tolerance in the world. Without you, Kathy Griffins reality TV show wouldn't be anywhere near as funny. Without you, most men still wouldn't know how to dress themselves (Queer I for the Straight Guy, thanks you). Now the next question on my mind is...............what would happen if I got hit by the Care Bear Stare? I think that I am better off not knowing. We are all probably better off.

"Any activity becomes creative when the doer cares about doing it right, or doing it better." -John Updike

Meetings

2007-07-15T17:59:00.000-06:00

I have another meeting at work tomorrow. I have no idea what this one is about. I am assuming that some built up frustrations will be released. If the meeting goes well, or we are rebuked with furiousity, I am still amazed as how much meetings control out lives.

The dictionary defines a meeting as a "gathering of people for discussion". I think that most people in charge of calling a meeting have no idea what the word means. At most meetings, it is more of a lecture. One person talks and talks and talks. Some people listen, but most people act engaged when in reality they are secretly deciding what to get for lunch after the meeting is over.

Religion is known for meetings. Since we now know that the a "meeting" is really a hunger filled lecture, it is no surprise to me why so few people go to church. Church starts with sacrament meeting, then is followed by Sunday school. To end the day we attend priesthood meeting. So in reality we have a lecture, followed by school, and you end the day with another lecture. Church is like a Hogi Yogi from hell, where you get a low self-esteem sandwich and have Jello salad for dessert. How is this fair? We go to church for three hours a day, have meetings during the week and all we get is some green Jello with carrots once a month. Protestants have coffee and doughnuts every week after church and they are only in church for an hour!

Tomorrow I go to the great unknown meeting. If I get lectured, embarassed, or even praised. I will leave with my head tucked down with a smirk on my face, because I know to truth of what a meeting should be.

"Football incorporates the two worst elements of American society: violence punctuated by committee meetings." -George Will

Pony Problems

2007-07-14T00:43:00.000-06:00

I am used to having problems at work. That is one of the sad but true expectations of work. Things go wrong. Normally my problems consist of melting ice cream, bad milk, upset customers, and lazy employees. This week, on top of my normal load of problems is a pissed off pony. Yes folks, a real pony (that thing you asked for at Christmas but never got).

In our efforts to turn the Dairy into more of an attraction, an animal viewing area has been built. Inside it are a goat, sheep, and Blueberry with its cult, Cheesecake. When we first put Blueberry and Cheesecake in their new pen, we had no problems. Then we added the sheep which stayed clear of the pony. Then we added the goat. Goats are dumb, and this goat was no different. As I pulled up to work one day I saw our Dairy handyman, Brent putting up a divider of 2 by 4's in the pen, dividing the pony and cult from the other animals. When I asked why, Brent said "Blueberry kicked the crap of the goat".

I didn't think much of it, and just got back to work. Earlier this week, my first back from vacation. I had two customers come into the store and told me that the pony was trying to bite people. I quickly ran outside and as I approached the fence, the stupid pony came at me! It came an entire heads length outside the fence at me and as it walked away, it gave the fence a hard kick. I quickly called my boss and he took care of the situation. I figured that the problem was solved.

The next day the same thing happened again. A PMS'ing horse, a crying child, and a pissed parent. I called my boss again, but this time he couldn't come to the rescue. He was about to become a grandpa and had no time for the pony. So we took down our advertisments about the animals. Unfortunatley, it was too late. The word was out on the pony and more and more people were coming to check it out. Once again my boss was gone and I was left to deal with the issue. I don't know what to do with a horse! My family has two dogs. One is the spawn of Satan and the other would fit better in a Beverly Hillbilly's movie than in our house.

I couldn't beat the pony (don't want PETA mad at me!). So instead, I put a sign up on the fence. This sign was more than just a warning. I was trying to make this sign put the blame on the customers if the horse came at them, when clearly this pony is more like a miniature, angry, drunk Mr. Ed. I had my doubts and figured that I would have more complaints. I didn't get another word, I even sat and watched as mocho men came up to the fence and were scared away by a pony. Even with this, I didn't get another word about my pony problem. Should I feel bad that I am "misleading" people or proud because of my wise use of words? How do you think I feel? Ah Ah Ah!

I feel like a duck.

2007-07-11T07:33:00.000-06:00

On Monday our FHE group invited a very knowledgeable young man to do a presentation on birds. I was amazed at how much he knew, and how dumb he made the rest of us feel. He reminded me of doctor Grant on Jurassic Park. I was just waiting for him to start some lecture on how we evolved from birds instead of Apes, but even more specifically that we evolved from a duck.

Duck's are this local experts favorite fowl. I had never known how many ducks their were in the world and how beautiful they could possibly be. The more I thought about it, the more I started to wish that we had evolved from Ducks. Monkey's smell funny (why yes, I do in fact smell monkey's on a regular basis!) and have abnormally long arms.

My dearest Fiancee' Kelly was in Idaho with me this week. We played and worked hard. One night we went to the river and fed the ducks. Maybe I just don't appreciate ducks enough, but these ones are really selfish. Most of them quarrel like 5 year old's over a piece of stale bread. Then I noticed something. Amid all the selfishness, a mommy duck and about 10 duck puppies came to get some bread. Everything changed, no more fighting, no more squawking. The mommy duck and her ducklings got all the bread we had left. Was there some kind of bond between these ducks that was more than instinct?

During this young man's lecture, he showed us a slide of a beautiful duck. It was a small duck with red,black, and white plumage (that means "feathers"-just in case you were wondering). He explained that this duck was not only one of the most beautiful, but had many other unique traits. This duck doesn't migrate north to south, but east to west. This duck isn't a duck whore either. It mates for life, and manages to find its singular "lady" or "man" each year. As I sat in the lecture, I realized that this Duck was a perfect example of Kelly and I. She lives in the mid west, I live in the west. We are traveling back and forth spending large amounts of money for one reason. (sorry folks) love! If I had too, I would travel farther.

Now, I just hope that someone from Dreamworks will randomly come across this blog and then instead of 5 animated movies about penguins, someone will start a new trend with Ducks. Then in a year, after the fifth and final Duck movie has hit the theatre, you can go to Target and put together a "Duck movie collectors item gift set" and sell it on Ebay for 45.00 dollars. Making 800% percent more than the 5.00 bucks you spent on the dang thing.

Remember, anyone can juggle for a second. -John Alejandro King

Teeth Brushing!

2007-07-01T17:57:00.001-06:00

It has been almost 3 years since I last saw a dentist. I have taken the necessary precautions and used incredibly overpriced teeth cleaning tools to prevent any discomfort during this 3 year period. Last week I finally started to get a toothache, which prompted my future visit to the dentist.

After I scheduled the appointment, I was pondering my teeth and something hit me. "I have never seen my Dad brush his teeth"? I then asked my Mom "does Dad brush his teeth?" She gave me the stupid question look and told me "yes, of course he does".

Having a feeling of doubt and thinking that my mom might have been lying to me. I approached my sister with this conundrum. After a couple minutes of heckling, we both agreed that my Dad must brush his teeth. Questions still remain, When? How long? Has this been a conspiracy my entire life to hide this from the children because my Father was a horrible example of personal hygiene. Would things be different if we had known that my Dad didn't brush his teeth at all or even just less than the sand timer on the bathroom counter? Would my family have gotten dental insurance?

An educated guess would say that very little would be different in our home. The only real difference is that I would like my Dad to leave the bathroom door open so that I can have the proof I need that he really brushes his teeth.

Parents are the bones on which children sharpen their teeth. -Peter Ustinov

Spite

2007-05-20T17:09:00.000-06:00

Don't do things out of spite! LOL. There is a good story behind this, too bad most of you will just never know!

Cookie

2007-05-19T14:40:00.000-06:00

Each person has a pattern in most of there daily activities. Everything from how they get dressed in the morning, what they do before they back the car out of the driveway and what your meals consist of.

Personally, each of my meals must consist of three basic types of food.

1. Potato chips. Before you get that look on your face that says "what is wrong with this kid?" Have you been to your neighborhood Wal-Mart? (I know you have one). Have you looked at the chip aisle? It is smorgasbord of any taste and texture that you could possibly desire. A good potato chip is like a good wine, it can help bring out the flavors in a main course. If all else fails, then I am perfectly comfortable eating chips as the main course instead.

2. Bacon, now who doesn't love bacon? Bacon is a great example of something that can unite the world and its many cultures. Vegetarians, vegans, and even people of the Jewish faith can all enjoy the wonderful taste of bacon thanks to modern technology and the use of soy. Bringing about world peace has been unsuccessful in the world up to this point because of our failure to share this salted meat product with our enemies.

3. Cookies. A cookie can either make or break a meal. I enjoyed a great meal from Jack in the Box yesterday. I had been drinking a large glass of milk in a fairly narrow cup. The cup was too narrow for me to dip an entire cookie, so I had to tear the cookie and half in order to dip it in my milk. When I tore this cookie, I weakened its structure and on my last dip it broke apart and fell into my milk. I tried to stick my hand into the cup, but my fat hands were unable to save my precious cookie. So I chugged the remaining milk as a then soggy and milk saturated glob of cookie ended up in my mouth, ruining the meal entirely.

Excuse me for not expounding more on the deep secrets in life, I need to hit the treadmill.

Ordinary

2007-05-05T13:20:00.000-06:00

When does something become ordinary? Is it when it has been repeated time and time again, until it becomes almost second nature?

One month ago, my life was what might be considered ordinary. I was doing what everyone expects from a 21 year old return missionary. I was in school, working, and trying to be social enough to someday find a wife. This is ordinary for an Idahoan life. The major flaw in being ordinary is that it doesn't always necessarily mean that you are happy.

In the course of two weeks, and the most amazing girl in the entire world. My life became first un-ordinary. I became classified as crazy! Insane! Or irrational. I met, dated, and became practically engaged in 2 weeks. From the first date, from the first kiss, I thought to myself "If I don't marry this girl, it might just be the dumbest thing I could ever do." So I quit school, moved back home, got a job at the dairy that I told myself that I would never go back too. I was more and more un-ordinary.

Over the last two weeks, my parents and some of my other family members have had the great chance to meet the "girl of my dreams". She has won them over, and each day I fall more and more in love with her. So my life that went from being ordinary, to un-ordinary, has now become extra-ordinary! This extra-ordinary state will fade over time to the outside world, and my life will once again become "ordinary". My idea of ordinary is very different than others ideas, this difference make the world an exciting place to live. A world where ordinary is never quite what it seems.

you can only imagine how jealous my mouth is.

2007-04-15T17:31:00.000-06:00

In being a young adult, and a college student. My life has three basic categories.

1.School
2.Work or paying for school
3.Girls

I am a pretty good student, and have recently found my niche as an english major. I love to read and write and someday hope to be a world class journalist. I am a cook at a fairly successful restaurant that pays well. So number one and number two are taken care of. I have decided to live in denial about number three and say that I am doing fairly well at it too, that is as long as my laptop is given a female personality and you could call her my girlfriend.

I am such a better writer than I am a speaker. My writing isn't always grammatically correct, but it is always honest and a true representation of who I am. When I talk to actual girls, I see how pretty they are and not wanting to disappoint I put on a front. This front isn't that much different than I really am, but it still leads to doubts and eventually lies. Lies will destroy any kind of relationship, or in my case any attempt at a relationship. You can only imagine how jealous my mouth is of my fingers. For once, these oddly curved and dry hands are the envy of something else.

Thank you blog. Thank you laptop. It would be creepy for me to refer to you as the love of my life, but you are pretty darn close.

Might be a redneck if..............

2007-04-08T00:50:00.000-06:00

Idaho is the direct opposite of the word "diverse". Yet, even in Idaho culture there are still stereotypes and tonight, I unfortunately am going to help perpetuate one! (oops)!

It was a bright and sunny, Friday afternoon and my friend Mike and I were driving past the local Wal-Mart. I must admit that I do appreciate the everyday low prices at Wal-Mart but sometimes I wish that they would close long enough to get that funky smell out of the air. That smell is of.................rednecks.

As we were driving by, one of these rednecks drove out the parking lot and was directly in front of us. It was an older 70's model pickup rusted over and missing its tail-gate. In the bed of the truck was a rather large teenage boy. Besides him was the garden of white, shiny bags, fluttering in the wind. As we followed this truck I was enthralled by the "redneckedness" of the situation. The young man proceded to look in the bags and eventually found what seemed to be like a hidden treasure. It was a DVD. He attempted to rip off the plastic wrapping but his larger fingers were to blunt too puncture it. So he resorted to using his teeth. With his mouth open wide, I wondered if he was going to get the plastic off or eat that DVD like a $20 dollar miniature candy bar! It was very humorous, once the plastc was gone he had to remove all of those dumb stickers! He once again used his teeth, but instead of throwing the stickers into traffic he stuck them to the side of the truck!

Amid this very simple action, I was almost laughing fruit smoothie out of my nose and at the same time wishing that my cell phone camera had some zoom on it! But the fun was not over, he then started to once again pick through the bags and open up a can of Mountain Dew. I do not question his choice of beverage for I am also a lover of the Dew, but I once again found it funny that he took off his baseball hat, leaned his head back on the roof of the cab and pulled on the sleeves of his short sleeve short just a little bit more and seemed to be, dare I say "tanning!". He didn't move for the remander of the time we followed him. We went straight at the next light while they turned right, heading in the direction of Firth. I almost wish that we had followed him, but Mike and I wanted to get a round of 18 holes of disc golf in before it got dark. Wait.........did I just say.............disc golf..............crap! Have you seen who plays disc golf. I better finish and post this blog before I think twice!

losing............yourself

2007-03-27T09:45:00.000-06:00

Human emotions are an amazing thing. They are in a very literal sense the creative force behind our existence. Emotions mold us. They sculpt us into the person we are today. Eventually in our lives, we become happy with whom we are. You could call this our own personal state of nirvana. Just as I found out this morning, you can lose this confidence in your emotional state and not even realize it.

Some might call me prideful, arrogant or ignorant to reality. I would argue with those skeptics that it is confidence in its true form. It took years of trials to develop myself into this regardless of what others might say of me. I awoke this morning full off fear, doubt, and frustration. As I walked to class, my mind raced. Searching frantically for the reason my attitude has changed much like my mother when she searches for her car keys.

Approaching campus, I walked in the shadow of the stadium wall. Consumed by the darkness, yet looking no more than 50 feet ahead and seeing the pathway once again lit by the glistening sun. Just as the contrast between lightness and darkness, one powerful human emotion can either leave us lying cold and broken in the darkness or basking in the warmth of light………………love.

I have learned to master anger. Countless times have I run a six minute mile after being offended. Countless nights have spent doing extra homework, or staying late at work because of some situation that gave birth to anger. Yet in my mastery of anger, it has left me vulnerable to the effects of love. Only once in my life have I been in the beauty of the basking warmth of love, and even then the sun of love became eclipsed by the moon of change, once again leaving me in darkness.

The first step in solving any problem is to realize that you have one. I know I have a problem, but now how do I fix it? Do I run away from love forever, for fear of being left in the darkness? Trying to regain the angry confidence so easily lost? Do I brave the unknown light to face the inevitable failure which has beset me in the past? When I fail, do I turn it to anger?

This anger is futile for the purpose of building up my faith in love. Anger and love cannot coexist in the same realm. I wish I had taken the full dose of my sleeping pill last night. I might still be asleep right now, hiding from these thoughts and hopefully escaping them forever. If I didn’t have them now, they would have caught up to me eventually.

Normally when I write, it helps resolve a conflict. This has perpetuated it to a certain degree. Every girl with internet access can now read my insecurities. Luckily I am not the only one that feels this way. If we look deep enough in all of our heart we will find that we are all afraid of the unknown. We are all afraid of losing ourselves. Some people lose themselves in drugs, alcohol, or food. Would you say I have lost myself to love or have I lost myself in fear? Regardless of how I live weather in love or fear, I have a feeling that I am about to do something stupid.

"Love does not begin and end the way we seem to think it does. Love is a battle, love is a war; love is a growing up." -James Baldwin

Backwards

2007-03-23T00:17:00.000-06:00

Have you ever had one of those days, it isn't a bad day but not a normal day either. Today was one of those days.

I am a morning person, I like to get things done early and play late and hard. This morning, I had to drag myself out of bed. I love history and am normally very active in my history class. The only knowledge of my history class today was an imprint of the letters "LLED" on my forehead from falling asleep on my laptop.

When all of my classes were over, I have a pretty normal routine of doing my homework that is necessary for the next day of classes, then I get in my daily workout. Today all I did was sit on the couch and watch TV, even this was strange. I was annoyed by watching ESPN. Instead I watched some dumb cartoon on Cartoon Network.

When driving to Idaho Falls for work, I obeyed the speed limit (that does not happen very often). I even thought about giving up shaving my head and growing my hair out again! When I was listening to music, I listened to some country music of my own free will. About this time, my mind asked the same question every couple of minutes "what the hell is wrong with you?".

Work was still work. I was assigned to work the grill, but tonight was the opposite of the previous night. The night before I cooked what felt like a million T-bone steaks. Tonight I cooked more Salmon then Albertsons has in its deli. After work, I obeyed the speed limit on the way home and drove with the radio off for fear of turning it to a country station.

Once I sad settled into my apartment, still puzzled by the abnormalities of the day's events I grabbed my PJ's and headed for the shower. As I started to peel my clothes off to shower. I glanced at myself in the mirror. With one eyebrow raised my mind once again asked me a question........................ "Why the hell is your underwear on backwards?"

Empty Desk

2007-03-18T00:07:00.000-06:00

Math is my most hated subject. It has always been my vice. Yet this semester, my first back in school since returning home from my mission has been my most enjoyable class. Until today atleast.

A week ago, sitting directly in front of me would have been Allison Brady. A quiet, and smart girl with a general positive attitude. Today a new girl is in that desk, someone I don't know and am afraid to get to know. Why would I be afraid you might ask? I am afraid of loss. Over the weekend, Allison was killed in a tragic four-wheeling accident. There is no way to prepare for such a loss and I barely knew her.

Is it wrong for me to wish that the desk was empty today? Am I justified in being angry that this new girl has no respect for the deceased? She has no idea, I can't hold it against her. It reality I am looking for some way to cope, to surpress these emotions that are so uncommon in normal life. To lose a daughter, sister, friend or even just a fellow schoolmate can shake the very foundations of our faith.

On sunday my emotions came to the surface. I put myself in Allison's brothers shoes. I have a sister than is my best friend, someone I wouldn't want to live without. I still have my sister, yet Tyler does not. I can ask over and over again "why", but I doubt I will ever comprehend. After my tears had been shed on my mothers shoulder and my dad offered me a fathers blessing. I had to live my life. I literally prayed on Sunday as I was working that we would have a record setting day and I would have no time to think. Instead we had the slowest day since our opening. The more my mind thought, the more I wanted to go home and crawl into bed. I wanted to wake up, finding out it really was just a bad dream. That Tyler would have Allison back. That I wouldn't fear for the loss of my best friend.

What happened cannot be changed, and it may never be understood in this life but we can find peace. The Atonement of Jesus Christ is real. The priesthood is real and just as with faith and the proper use of the preisthood people can be physically healed, even those that didn't see the physical healing(such as us) we can still see the power of faith and can be blessed by wise hands of fathers and brothers and friends to be saved and strengthened from the tormenting emotional pain that a grieving soul feels.

No one can fill the void that is the empty desk. Yet something as vivid as the memory of the empty desk will be engrained in the minds of those that knew her, forever. Do I hide from this memory, try to block it from my conscience or do I use it to motivate me. I knew very little of Allison, yet I was always impressed by her maturity for being so young. She restored my faith that all people, even those younger than me were capable of acting beyond what the world expected of them.

Just as a football team touches its school logo as it runs out of the locker room onto the playing field hoping to live up the memory of all those that came before them. As I leave math, I can touch that desk as I run back into the playing field of life. Hoping to live and emulate the life of Allison, even me, just a fellow student in a simple math class has been changed forever not by the loss of Allison, but by the memory of Allison.

"A being afire with life cannot foresee death; in fact, by each of his deeds he denies that death exists." -Marguerite Yourcenar,

Up to 11!

2007-03-16T01:33:00.000-06:00

Being a young adult, some people might say that I am hip or cool (those that don't really know me). I am a guy that loves music and wishes he could always have it on. Thanks to the blessings of modern technology we have almost unlimited access to mass media at the touch of a button. I use an I-POD as a way to carry my music with me, wherever I go. When I walk from class to class, I have my ear buds in and the music blasting. Some people might find this strange, call me anti-social. I wish it was this easy to explain.

Life is full of ups and downs,and in the course of a week any one person will be challenged by a wide variety of emotions. Anything from frustration, anger, love, or hatred. When I put in those earbuds, I am making a choice. This choice is much more than just a song. These songs have been chosen because they represent me, they represent me in the past and me in the future. I am choosing to either lead my life or roll over and die, giving up on my hopes and dreams. So when you see me on campus, walking,running, or riding my bike and I am making brisk circular motions with my thumb it is not because I am technologically retarded but that I am still trying to turn it up to 11.

When the ups and downs of life hit, and lately they have been hitting hard. I need that extra drive and focus to push through. There is no time for distractions, no desire for wasted time. If only I could turn the volume up to 11. I can just imagine it on the screen as the volume meter bursts out of the screen. My ear buds are shot from my ears, yet I can still hear the music. This music which defines me is heard by no one else. They don't hear it, not because they don't care but because there music is already playing. So to all those people who stare at me funny when you can hear my music pounding, I give you a warning to wait until I can turn it up to 11.

"Destiny is not a matter of chance, it is a matter of choice; it is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved."-William Jennings Bryan

A Queen is just a pawn with a bunch of fancy moves.

2007-03-09T19:08:00.000-07:00

Chess is a very complicated and an almost seemingly sophisticated game. Each piece has its own rules and limitations. Life is a symbolic game of chess. Especially during the summer and even more so in a university setting. And just like every game of chess, one piece can be either a great protector or a lethal weapon. The queen. Ok, ladies you are those queens. I believe that you should be treated that way too. I addressed this issue in my previous blog.

Just as the men have reasons to behave, so do the queens. Now ladies, you must remember that you have powers that no one can even understand. But just like a queen in a game of chess, you really are just a pawn with a bunch of fancy moves. You can choose to use your powers for good or for evil. You can choose to play the game in a conservative way and stand next to your king. Or you can be a predator and create a monster of yourself and of your prey. Chess might be boring, but atleast it won't leave you lying beat and broken on the floor when summer is over!

More than just a Ringtone

2007-03-09T18:04:00.000-07:00

The normal brown and gray landscape of Idaho winter is coming to an end. The snow is melting and the grass is looking greener and greener everyday. Spring is a very short season here. Next on the list is summer. In BYUI and any other setting filled with young single people. You will encounter drama. This is my plea to avoid it. This blog is directed to the men.

A popular song on the radio today makes reference to true love being a special ringtone for your girlfriend. If only love was this easy. Unfortuately, due to pop culture that false idea seeps into what is a seemingly wholesome lifestyle. For some unknown reason when summer starts, it is a greenlight for guys to play the field. No details are required as to what these guys do, their actions are louder than words.

The summer fling is hard on more people than just the person being played. It effects that persons family, friends and mostly future suitors. Is it fair for someone that might have met the girl of his dreams to walk away because she is afraid of getting hurt? Something as special as real love (not just a ringtone) cannot be tampered with for three months of summer and then expected to go right back to normal, because it does not go back to normal and it will not go back to normal. For the sake of all those young women and all of those men that might date your "fling" in the future please tread with caution. Keep you cell phone ringer on "reality" for the summer, and make the world a better place.

Something I love

2007-03-05T15:32:00.000-07:00

How many times have you gone running, and had to push yourself up that last hill? How many times have you rolled your ankle and played through it to keep your team in the game? How many times have you wanted the ball in the last 5 seconds to finish the game? I have had all of these expereinces. I love them, I live for them. They are apart of me.

If i were to attend a substance abuse program, this is how I would introduce myself "Hello, my name is Bryan and I have a "sportscenter" addiction." I just got done watching an episode. Some things that happen today in professional sports are horrible. Blindside hits in hockey that put someone in the hospital, a flagrant foul that breaks a players nose, wrecking your team-mate so that you can win your first race. These people need to be appropriately punished for their actions. Unfortunately we aren't effected only by those athletes that play the games, but by those that are trying to come back.

I am speaking about two people. Scottie Pippen has been in talks with Phil Jackson of the LA lakers. I highly doubt that anything will amount to him playing again, but just the idea makes me sick. If Scottie is bored, he needs to pick up golf even if he probably sucks at it like Charles Barkley. He is 41. The league is better without him, why tarnish a great leagacy?

You think Scottie pisses me off, just wait. David Beckham, the european soccer player that announced his plans to play for the LA galaxy this August. Pardon the pun, but Beckham can bend his career right up his ass for all I care. He is well past his prime and is using his star power to con some retarded owner and GM to let him come and tarnish US soil. He is asking for 250 million over 5 years. If he was a true lover of the game and wanted to help the MLS develop some much needed credibility he would play for a fifth of that amount. He is nothing more than a greedy bastard looking for attention. If he really wants attention, then he should just shave his head and go in and out of rehab 3 times in a week. Or he could just divorce his wife and get back together. Screw up your own lives, not take advantage of your status and your fans, fans that pay large amounts of money to buy your jersey's and come to your games. You had better have more than shin guards on when you play one season and then opt out of your contract to be in Tom Cuises's next movie. Your fans will be pissed!

First Semester

2007-02-27T01:14:00.000-07:00

Well, it is 1:14 in the morning and I get to reward myself by writing a blog! How sad is a poor Idaho boys life when the highlight of the day, is to write a blog!

My first semester of school is off and running. BYU-I is a unique place and I can say that three things imp articular are driving me crazy.

#1. The library here, is not a library! It is a room full of books that are decorated by tables full of students. There is a wide range of students in the library. The most common is the "couple". Come on, why try to justify spending excessive amounts of time together by hanging out at the library? My favorite person to see at the library is the paranoid student. They constantly check the clock making sure they aren't late for there next class, they look up from any book they read as if to make sure they aren't being followed. I can understand why you might be paranoid, We practically have to auction off a limb on Ebay to pay for those books. The most entertaining person is the "out-loud" reader. Last week, I forgot my IPOD and I was forced to listen to an entire chapter of a nursing manual on Hemorrhoids. Another problem with the library is the vending machines. I understand that alot of students are there for long periods of time that might need some food. Yet they must use some common sense as to what they put in them. For example, Doritos! A am convinced that a scientist needs to study the sound that is produced from biting a Dorito. It echoes regardless of the room and sneaks it way past any electronic listening device. I once again was an unfortunate bystander of a Dorito attack. My particular experience was even worse, because it was at 9 in the morning. No human mouth should be subjected to Doritos at that time of day. Showing no remorse, this young man went back for seconds.

#2. Tests in college are hard. At BYU-I they have something called the "testing-center". It is the entire 2nd floor of a building. It holds 400 students, but most of the time you are stuck in this huge, ice cold room with 2 people, one that has a squeaky desk and the other a runny nose. Paid student employees walk around the three of you holding a miniature clip-board. Do they offer the sickly student a Kleenex? Of course not, there might just be a Kleenex with the answers on it! For being a religious school, they sure don't seem to trust us at taking tests!

#3. The landscaping, just last week. They cut down all of the trees on one half of campus. Just in time for spirit week and the weekend when our moms get to come up and see campus. It is ultra-tacky! Even more annoying is a particular stretch of sidewalk. This is a standard width sidewalk, but some retard engineer decided that instead of putting the light and telephone post on the edge of the sidewalk. They would put the poles in the direct center of the sidewalk! I am convinced that it was designed for all the girls on campus that want to avoid holding hands with some lame guy that asked them to go for a walk on a warm summers night. (No, I do not know this from experience, not yet anyways!)